my husband has terminal liver cancer

We were told the same thing for my husband a month ago. He has bowel cancer. Devastated doesn’t seem to even come close to how we felt and still feel. I am so very sorry that you are both going through this too. There is nothing I can say to make it any better, but you are absolutely not alone - knowing that from being on this forum brought me more comfort than I thought I would feel. Not sure there is any being strong for him. You’ve just got to be you and take it day by day. Allow yourselves both the time to process and cry and scream - whatever you need to do. We found there was just a little bit of calm once we had done that. The tears still come don’t get me wrong, but they dry just a little more quickly each time. Everyone is different though. There is no right or wrong, but you love each other and you will work out how you get through this together. Sending big hugs x

Oh bobbyrosie, I'm so sorry you got this awful diagnosis. We got my husband's terminal diagnosis last  September- two days after our 25th wedding anniversary. Like you, I've been with him since we were 18. As Bim07 says there are no words I can say that will make it any better. This forum has been a great support to me over the months and know that you're not alone here. We've all got our own tales to tell but we understand in a way friends and family perhaps can't. 

Stay strong. Take it one step at a time. Tears are a sign of strength and resilience so let them flow. Bottling it all up is worse. It takes time to process the amount of information that's come your way and there's no right way or wrong way to feel and react. 

Hang in there

love n hugs

Wee Me  xx

Im deverstated . Iv cried day and night for a week . Im numb today just in a daze. My husband is so strong the thing is hes not sick at all no pain no liver cancer symtoms. Everyday im looking at him asking him if hes in pain seeing if theres any symtoms. Im so scared of him being in pain . I look more sick than him iv lost weight cant eat or sleep. I need tobe strong where do you get your strenth from x

I’m so sorry to hear your terrible news.  Sadly I’m going through a similar situation as my husband found out last month he has bowel cancer with only months left to live. He’s already had stomach cancer in 2019 and had only just returned to work a week before lockdown. It’s just so unfair. My Mum also passed away 2 days after his diagnosis so it’s really tough coming to terms with everything.   I’ve cried every day since and don’t know how I’ll get through, but I’m just taking a day at a time.  Some days are ok and some are a struggle.

We’ve started going to our local Maggies Centre which is giving us both emotional and practical support. I’ve also been calling MacMillan to get some emotional support as there are some things I feel selfish saying in front of my husband.  I don’t feel it’s fair me moaning when he’s terminally ill. MacMillan staff have been great and somehow saying things out loud helps.  This forum also helps as there’s lots of people in the same situation. You just need to try a few things to see what works best for you.  Remember to be kind to yourself and get support, as you can’t help your husband if you’re not well.  Take care xx

All you can do is take it moment by moment, and when you feel a little stronger then day by day. There is not right way to deal with any of this. It is just devastating. There’s no escaping that and no magic trick to making it any more bearable. Are you two talking about it and being there for each other?  He is very fortunate not to be in pain, but even if he ends up in pain your local hospice will be able to provide pain relief to keep him comfortable. We have only recently found out just how amazing they can be, and they are a wonderful support. Just remember that although this is happening to you both - and in different ways - that you are not alone. You will have family and friends who want to do anything they can to help. Let them. There is also the Macmillan care line. Use it. You don’t have to go through this alone and it sounds like you really do need to share the hurt and the pain that you are feeling. Even if it’s just continuing to type it all out on this forum. Everyone understands exactly what you are going through and how you feel. Believe me, I’m not being strong. I cry pretty much every day, it has just reduced from all day every day to once or twice a day. I try to tell myself that every day I spend being sad is a day that I give away/waste that I could be spending with him and making the most of being with him and making him smile and laugh. It doesn’t always work as feelings are powerful things, but sometimes it does. Sending hugs xx