Hi im new to this group and looking for any advice. My mums lung cancer has returned and she is too ill now for any treatment she is not eating only having those meal replacement drinks and is hardly mobile at all and is sleeping alot she went into hospital but they are sorting out a discharge soon with some support and the imput of the palliative care team its all in process at the moment but i dont know what thehy will offer her support wise and its so hard speaking to anyone and trying to find out whats going on. My mum has said she doesnt want to know how long shes got but we as her fanily feel we do any suggestions of how to manage this dillema im frighteded iof whats comming i suppose i know my mum wants to be at home and i want this for her as well im just worried
thanks
Hi Honey4
Hi and welcome to the community though so sorry to hear about your mum.
The hospital is absolutely supposed to have a discharge plan before patients leave hospital and if you are being part of that plan pretty much you must be part of it. An issue is there is pressure on beds and social services are overloaded and people can fall through the cracks - sometimes we hear about bed blockers as if them staying in hospital was there fault rather than a lack of anywhere more appropriate.
On the subject of "how long" my wife never wanted a prognosis, it is worthwhile remembering they are at best an educated guess so unless someone has a real need many people ask what benefit might be provided
I did a living with less stress course that really helped me - learnt to appreciate every day rather that living in the dark world of pre-grief where Janice was already dead. The breathing exercises were great too for when life throws curveballs at us out of the blue - covid for example. Transcendental mediation though just did not really work for me.
You are worried - most normal thing in the world in your situation - only thing me wife really hates is being called brave.
We cope because we need to - be prepared to take all the help that is on offer and look after yourself too - you mum both wants you and needs you to be good.
<<hugs>>
Steve
