My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Thank you for a lovely after noon  yesterday lovely to meet lynn and mandy hoping  to make the October meet

love to you all

take care love janice xx

Hello from Newfoundland.  It is so beautiful here and finally I have relief from that hot hot weather, cooler here and sunny, just perfect.  Friday we were driving around a cove and came upon pods of whales feedng, couldn't see a lot of the whales, a few backs and tails but so many spouts popping up all over, it was amazing!

We have a long drive around part of the coast planned for later in the week, dinner at a restaurant with a spectacular view tomorrow and probably lots of little jaunts here and there.  It is great to not be rushing around and take some time to relax.  I have a hard time with relaxing but here it is impossible not to,

I am glad you enjoyed your meet yesterday and send hugs to all

Bren

It sounds glorious, Bren - enjoy xx

Oooh Bren that all sounds wonderful, pictures on Facebook by any chance?  Glad it is a bit cooler for you, then sun has left us now as well and it's early autumn temperatures now as the leaves begin to change colour as well. Oh no!  I'd almost forgotten the autumn nightmare of leaf clearing - anyone available to sweep and collect every week for a month or more?  If I'm lucky the weather will dry up again as the leaves fall and the mower will do the main work, the drive still gets covered though.  Ah well it's really pretty though.

Mandy, nice to meet you here and glad you all had a good time in Manchester yesterday.  Sue we southern belles will have to show them what we're made of in London, hope to see you there.  Patricia you did get the right end of the stick, I have a beautiful hat which goes with a dress I was planning to wear but the hat doesn't go with me, so I thought maybe Judi's hat friend might like it for her collection.  Haven't made notes so now lost the plot of all I was going to say - waving madly at you all though xxxx

Just got back from the in-laws and he has had to give in and confine himself to bed at tleast for the forseeable future, it's the only place where he can get comfortable and the pain either goes completely or at least enough to be a relief.  We think that where the tumour is on his spine it must have caused damage or is itself pressing on a nerve as not even the Oramorph touches the pain, but as soon as he can lie down things improve, sister-in-law has now explained this in detail to the GP who is hopefully going to get something done about it, so far everyone concentrates on the cancer and not what it's causing so they just keep dishing out different pain relief and not taking in the fact that none of it is doing anything.  Also they have now been referred to MacMillan so help is on it's way there too and maybe the nurse will be able to persuade him to have a few bits of equipment that will help the day to day living, bless them it's that giving up of the independence moment that is so hard.  We had a good couple of hours though as he was able to enjoy the conversation and being with us as we sat around the bedroom nattering (three women - Dave will understand the joy of that I'm sure) I took over one of the bridesmaids dresses to show them and told them all about Sam's honeymoon she booked this week, so there was lots to natter about and give them something else to think about for a while.

Sam is coming over for dinner tonight so I will away to get things on the move there and be back later, take care all of you and hope you are having good weekends xxxxxxxxx

Well i'm connected at last to my broad band so hopefuuly no more slow internet lol , i'll celebrate with a long post (so any body want to nod off do so now ) It was lovely to meet you too Mandy and hopefully you will get to the london meet and meet some other penguins . Hope fully Sue , Rosemary and Quill will make it to pleeeeesesssss

s as i'm dying to meat the "southerners" i owe some hugs to you all . Rosemary the 8 months (sshh ) will go so fast and i do hope your FIL get his pain under control , so cruel when they are in pain but i know if anyone can give your in laws the support they need its you xxx . Sue how is your foot now ? hopefully your on the road to recovery and no more mishaps please  leave it to the experts but i do think i may lose my title as calamity Jane , Mandy has done quite a bit and she had us in stitches with her stories , keep em coming Mandy ... Patricia , hope you;ve caught up on your sleep now . How is your hulu hooping going , i havn't been to buy 1 yet but i intend to this week . Gayle and Lesley , hope you;ve had great holidays , your photos look great on face book Lesley , it looks a beautiful place . Gayle i'll Pm about the meets ..

 Helen have a fantastic time at the lakes , and hope you got your packing done at last lol

Well i was up really early again this morning so i decided that was a good time to go for my walk/jog and it was , it was lovely without a soul in sight , i'll have to see if i can do it on other mornings too . Well i wont push my luck to much and post this as i know sometimes the mac site will steal your post too .

 Take care all

 hugs Lynne xxx

Rosemary, sorry to hear your father in law is experiencing so much pain right now. I hope that something can be sorted for him very quickly. 

Lynne, I just don't believe that anyone could steal your 'calamity jane' title. It does not seem possible.

It has been a beautiful sunny day here and I hope you have all had a reasonable day.

Bren, I am glad you are finding things just a little easier at the moment. I hope you enjoy your trip.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Evening xx

Rosemary hope you f in law gets his pain controlled, nothing worse xx

Yes Mandy can have a good go at stealing Lynnes title lol!!!

Lynne glad you re up and running. My laptop wont charge as the lead is broken!! On the really slow pc so not happy!! Hula hoop!I didnt know Patricia had one, they are fab!! Although I confess I havent used mine for ages!!

I am almost packed, will finish in the morning. Forecast is good for tomorrow but not so good for Tuesday so going to try and make the most of tomorrow for boat trip etc. Cant wait!!! Got my waterproof coat and walking boots ready lol!! Sexy or what lol!!!

Yesterday was great and so glad Mandy has found us here too x

Have a good week everyone, I m back sometime Wednesday. Speak then

Helen xxx

have a fab time, Helen

        Enjoy the walking - hope the sun shines for you

sue xx

Hola everyone,

I'm back lol.  I got back at 1am this morning but my boyfriend was at the house waiting for me so never got to bed until 4 then up at 9 with the monkeys so very tired tonight.  Had a good holiday in the end once I started relaxing into it.  Thats the problem - now I have to wind up to full pelt again :-)  My mum and dad were good company and the boys loved the holiday.  They were good as gold on the flight back which was brilliant as I was really stressing about travelling on my own with them.  It was too hot for me though.  It was nearly 40 degrees every day so was looking forward to coming back to the cool weather and we had a heatwave here today!  I also had someone supposed to be coming to view the caravan on Tuesday but they just cancelled.  Meanwhile I went up there today and cleaned and emptied it so I am in a huff now lol.  Never mind I am sure someone else will come along.  I had a weird moment on holiday though.  As you all know I have met someone and I am very happy with him and accepting that this is my new life and that Wully isn't coming back.  However, I didn't sleep well in Spain and one night when I had woke up I thought Wully was in the room for a second.  The room was very dark as it had black out curtains and it was just a shadow but for a split second I thought he was there.  I can't really describe the feeling that washed over me but it was just relief and so wanting him to be back and tell me it was just a bad dream.  I am sure we have all had the same day dream where our loved ones walk back into our lives.  Then of course you are flooded with disapointment when that split second passes.  Anyway, I better get off to bed soon as I am shattered and back to work tomorrow although from home at least.

Welcome to the new people and hope you can find some support here.  Helen, have a great holiday.  Rosemary, your FIL pain sounds a bit like Wully's (which unfortunately I became an expert on).  He had tumours within some vertebrae in his spine which then collapsed and at times pressed on the spinal column.  He was on oxycontin (amongst many others - he was on up to 65 tablets a day) which was the best drug for him but the thing that helped the most for the severe pain was steroids.  They reduced the inflamation which then in turn stopped the tumour pressing down so much causing the shooting pains down Wully's legs.  They were a god send even though they had terrible side effects.  I know you aren't supposed to be on them long but Wully couldn't be taken off them - they did try but the pain was too bad.  He only stopped them a couple of days before he died.  Perhaps they might help FIL? 

Anyway, love to all the penguins.

Gayle xxx 

p.s. the advise you gave me re boyfriend was spot on.  I left it and as time is going on mum and dad are coming round to it and talking about him now.  So thanks - I knew I would get the right answer here!

Welcome back Gayle.

Have a good time Helen.

Love the pic Sue.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x