My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Gayle, I just want you to know that I am thinking of you and hoping that you all get through the next few days without falling apart. 

Love and angel hugs to you and the boys x x x Patricia x x x

Hi

I am new on here have read through some of these posts.  My lovely husband died at home on 24th May he had gullet cancer.  I feel so lost and lonely but am trying to keep going for my son he is 14.

Hi Piglet,

I am so sorry for your loss.  I too lost my husband to cancer of the gullet on Fathers Day last year.  I have 2 sons aged 5 and 4.  I am sorry you have had to find us but you will find the support on here a huge help and I couldn´t have got through the past twelve months without the lovely ladies (and Dave) on this thread.  Please keep reading and post if it helps.  We are hear for each other in the good and bad times and don´t be afraid to come on here and just have a rant if it helps.  We all understand what you are going through and hopefully will be able to help you.

Gayle xxx

Hi Piglet

So sorry that you find yourself in our company, we are all here for the same reason so do understand what you are going through.  I am sure no one will mind me saying that there is such a variety of ages, locations and timescales here, but we have genuinely found kindred spirits that help us each through the worst of times.  Lost and lonely - those words will resonaate with all of us.  I am sending hugs to you and your son.  And please do keep osting and stay with us - I think it can sometimes seem a little daunting to 'join in' because it must seem that we all know each other so well, but remember that wasn't always the case.  We have just grown to know and care about each other very much - there is always room for another Penguin xxx  If you have the time go back in this thread, you will see that we all have huge ups and downs, but there is always someone there to 'hang on to' and help you through. 

Gayle my little munchkin - hugs to you and the boys - so glad that you had the day with them and well done you for finding strength to go and do wonderful things with them.  See, we told you they just like a bit of fun time with mum occasionally.  ((((((   ))))))

It is FREEZING here today, I had to go and look out my thick polo neck jumper and padded jacket, not funny.  Finally got my dogs home today, because of viewers at the flat I had agreed to keep them at the kennels until now - so gald to have them back.  A uncommonly tired for me so tomorrow I will tell how 'one brain cell Joe' proved worthy of his nickname.

Much love to all - Judi xx

Thank you Gayle and Judi - I am dreading going to bed at night.  The nights are so long and I find sleep impossible but I am so glad I found this forum reading through the posts I realise sadly that I am not alone feeling this.  I now know that there is a whole sub-strata of misery and despair that I didn't know existed until cancer arrived in my family's life.

Evening All, Sorry about your loss Piglet, but what Gayle and Judi say is right we all know what you are going through. I don't know how i would have got through this awful time without the support of all the special friends i have have made on this site. Keep posting. Well my looking after my dad got off to a bad start, my sister went away on Thurs night and i got a phone call on Fri morning to say he had fallen out of bed we had the doctor and he wanted him to go into the hospital but he would not go he is just so set in his ways. I am not long back in from seeing him into bed so hopefully he will be ok tonight, i could stay but he would think i should stay ever night and it's ok when i am not working but no use when i am. O it's a worry. Gayle sending you big hugs you are doing great and glad you had a nice day with the boys, Jamie looks as if he was enjoying being in the big ball ( great photo ) Kim is very weepy today because of fathers day and she wishes her dad was still here she has bought him some nice rosses so we will take them to cemmie tomorrow, i have been up tonight and cleaned my mum and Derek's headstones so they are looking a lot better.  Hope everyone else is ok. Well i better get off to bed as up at dad's in morning again.

Morning all and welcome to piglet , you really have come to the right place for some amazing support , your road will be rocky but you will get through it and there will always be someone hear to listen . So sorry your having it rough with your dad Fiona and i so know what your going through , my dad would have us all there all the time if he could but it wouldn't take away his pain wahtever we did . I hope things improve soon Fiona (hugs) ..

 Well i have been assuring Gayle all week that i'm fine but as soon as i opened my eyes this morning the tears started , i'm crying for my mum on her birthday , i'm crying for Gordon who should be here with his kids on fathers day , i'm crying because this is the day when things really got bad last year , i'm crying for my Friend Gayle who has gone though so much in her young life and i'm crying for all my penguin freinds who all wish there loved ones were still here with them . I wish you all the love in the world and i thank you for being here ..

Take care

 Lynne xxxxx

Ohhhhh! Lynne - I'm sending you the biggest huggiest (((((((((((((hug)))))))))))))) I can this morning to comfort you........xxx

Welcome piglet - though I'm sorry it is under such sad circumstances - as has been said by others here you will find lots of support and space to rant and rave as and when you want/need it.....xxxx

And for all my penguin friends - and that includes piglet - more comforting ((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))) are here for you xxxxxxx

Dot xxxxxxxxxxx

Lynne, hun - hugest of huge hugs for you - know just how you feel.

hang on in there, gayle - you're doing everything right, and your little ones are fab.

Piglet - welcome to the thread, but so sorry that you've needed to join

.As the other girls have said, we have supported  one another through the bad times, and even managed to have some laughs on the way.You will laugh again, although it doesn't seem like it at the moment. Here is the place to rant, rave, share - there will always be someone around to listen and answer. We don't have any magical answers, but we have shared experiences of bereavement. We're all at different stages of our journeys, and we'll do what we can to help you with yours. Just take one day, one hour, one minute at a time, and go with the flow - as Helen says, keep on swimming.

Just taken Alice and her boyfriend to the station - they're off to london to see the Lion King, then sunset on the London Eye, so a quiet day here i think.  Helen put some beautiful tulips at the cemetery yesterday; It's odd in a way, as she was Alan's stepdaughter, but she  is the one who seems to have felt it the most.

Love to all my penguins,

Sue and napoleon. xx

Hi Everyone

Thinking of you all love and hugs xxx

love to you all

take care love janice xxxx