My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Morning all

Gayle - you don't need a kick up the bum - you need lots of comforting (((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))) - so there they are for you by the bucketful xxxxxx  Please pass some more ((((hugs)))) on to your lovely little boys too..........xxxxx

Judi - welcome back...........how lovely to meet and be remembered by folks you've not seen for a long while.  So pleased too that you had lots of time to relax and talk with Boy...........

Sue and Ailsa - and anyone else that I may have missed - well done to you all for doing the RfL yesterday.  The weather wasn't too good I admit but personally I prefer that to hot sun.....I wilt in the sun!!!!!  Between us we've raised lots of dosh for research and here's hoping it goes a long way towards finding that magic cure!!!  Alan didn't fare too well - he drove me there and although he found the burger van he got jostled a bit in the crowds when he tried to get to the finish line to cheer me in (he wouldn't use his scooter because of the rain so walked with his crutches).......  Anyway on a bright note - he's found another fishing spot - at the race course - so will be trying that out soon I guess...........

Sorry - I've now forgotten what else I was going to say - it's a pain not being able to refer back to all your comments..........so I'll just leave more love and (((((((((((((bug higs)))))))))))))) for you all

Dot xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Oh Gayle, huge hugs from across the ocean (((((((((()))))))))).  There is nothing I can say to make it better but hopefully knowing we are all here for you will help a little.

Congratulations to all who did the RFL and great photos.

Teri and I have met several times and I hope for a few more before she leaves.  I know she is busy with her sister also.  I can't believe I have only 3 more weeks to work and then school is closed.  So much paper work to get done and not enough time but I will be ready to be off for a while.  Trying to fill up the summer so that I am not home alone for very long.  I have booked a hotel in Buffalo, New York and a friend and I will go shopping there on July 4 and spend the night.  Then I will leave for Montreal on the 7th of July and keep going to Gaspe, Plattsburgh New York and back home sometime very late in July.  So now I am working on August and dog sitters, looks like it will work out and I will get to Newfoundland for a couple of weeks.  I know it is running away but it is what I must do right now.  And August is our anniversary and also the beginning of this time last year. 

It is still really, really hard but I can see that I have grown and come a long way in the last 7 months, especially with the support of all the penguins.  

Wishing all of you a good day and I better get back to work.

love

Bren

Awww Gayle, I so wish there was something that any of us could do to help... Sending you great big hugs and much love. Will be thinking of you and your lovely boys this week. xxx

Dearest Gayle, whilst I truly understand how you would be feeling so guilty for letting Wully go into the hospice, I also know that you did it with the best of intentions. You needed to try to recharge your batteries to help you to be strong enough to continue caring for him. How were you to know that his 'passing' was so imminent. Fate is a very unpredictable thing and we none of us can ever 'predict' the future. Guilt is a terrible thing which is generally unfounded.  Be kind to yourself and give yourself credit for being the kind and loving person you are.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Evening all Just sending big squigy hugs to Gayle and the boys , hang in there Hun we're all with you , and if you need to shout or sound off , i'm at home every evening xxxx

  Big thank you to Judi and Helen for the bottle of champers , you had me in tears , what you like xxx

 Well as most of you know i have been traumatised with the loss of my internet today , how can this happen ????? Well the reason i was so traumatised was i have sent so many e mails off to different people asking for prizes and it was driving me mad not to be able to check my mail box , my poor crew mate was getting a bit fed up of me huffing anf puffing i think . Well i've had a couple of successes and a couple of regects but i am grateful for anything so its all welcomme .. Cant wait now , cant wait to see my penguin friends again .. Hope everybody else is doing ok and Sue , Ailsa and Dottee  i hope you not to stiff and sore from your walk .. Take care Love to all Lynne xxxx

Hi Everyone, Gayle sending you loads of love I am thinking of you even though I am away. I have met up with Brenda afew times and we have had some good chats Iwill meet with her another few times before I come home.

I am having a good time but keep thinking Bert would love it here I think of him several times a day because every where we go he would have loved it even the shopping he was alwas a great shopper never complained and carried all the bags, I thought if I came to somewhere he had never been it would be easier but it is not really. I just have to paint on a smile and get on with it.

Love to all

Teri x

Well done to all who did the race for life. Welcome home Judi, good to see you enjoyed yourself. Nice to see that Teri and Bren have been meeting up. I hope you enjoy the rest of your trip Teri. Lynne, good to see your fundraiser is taking shape. Hopefully you will have a good day. Are you feeling any better Gayle? Fiona, Lynne, how are your dad's doing? Have a god evening everyone (if you can).

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Dear Gayle,

Oh, how I can sympathise with the guilt!  Should i..........If only i'd realised...........

Hindsight is always 20/20 - ~i bet that most of us would have done something differently, or perhaps not done something at all.  Guilt is a part of the grieving process; don't beat yourself up, hun. You did what was best at the time, and it was not your fault that things happened the way that they did. You are without doubt doing a fantastic job with your two little guys, and carrying your own emotional burdens whilst also helping them deal with theirs. You have great courage, Gayle - Wully will be proud of you.

'Grief is the price we pay for love. '

Love and ((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

sue xx

Sue, I am sensing that you need a 'penguin' hug so ((((((hugs))))))) for you.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Thanks, Patricia - I'm fine, honestly - just tired. Can't wait to finish this term now that they've made me redundant - time to see what the world at large has to offer!

love and hugs

Sue xx