My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Thanks for the birthday pics and messages and hope Alice had a lovely birthday too xx

I had a great day, much easier than last year but had a few moments thinking about Paul and missing him as always but safe in the knowledge he wants me to be happy as I do feel. Enjoying it while it lasts and hope it will xxx Got very spoilt  and had a lovely night with Liam, Nat and Liam s girlfriend xx Got more treats to come both this weekend and next so its not over yet lol!!!

Lesley lots of changes for you but so glad you re enjoying them and sure we ll always have tears for our loved ones but we know they ll be so pleased for us too.

Gayle you do need to think of you too and you are so busy so you re being sensible xxx

Manda thinking of you today, where has the time gone?

Patricia hope you get some sleep this weekend, I am looking forward to the games.

Ailsa I am like you, sleeping better than I was in the early days.. Still wake occassionally but nothing like I did xx Wish everyone who isnt sleeping all more sleep in the future, it is so tough when you cant.

Lynne sorry to hear about your Dad, hope you re enjoying your week off still xx

Liam and Nat are bit more chilled about their exams and plodding on so fingers crossed they do well

Hope everyone has a good weekend to look forward to, what you all up to?

Catch up with you all soon

Helen xxx

Evening all , Rain rain ran ,,,,, oh well at least i'm getting lots of things done and if the sun had been out i wouldn't have  .. I've been bombarding the local shops with posters (thanks to my lovely daughter ) and begging for raffle prizes , i've had some responce and i'm hoping for others to get back to me .Thank you Sue , Gayle and Amanda for also offering stuff for the day , its brill that my lovely friends on here have ve come to the rescue but i've not given up on my local friends yet , think they need more pushing lol . Dad has go to have another op as some bone has moved in his mouth and its causing pain and infections but he's in a b*****y waiting list , but he's quite happy that something can be done for him (hopefully)

Helen so glad you had a lovely birthday and still more to come , well done xx

 Ailsa i would love for you to come and "see Gordon " with me , Gayle and i had already talked about it so really looking forward to it now .. Patricia my thoughts are still with Little Charlotte and her family .. Bren , so glad you got to meet a fellow penguin at last , hopefully the first of many meetings xx Cant think what else i was going to say mmmmmmmmmm i'll be back xxxxx

Hello everyone,

Well feeling slightly better again today although now its night time I feel all bunged up again.  Had a really long day at work and just home now.  Ailsa, still work from home 3 days a week (supposedly but usually 5 days at home!) and work away 2 days and its either a 3 hr round trip or an 8hr trip alternate weeks about so busy busy.  Next week back in Aberdeen but my friend in up there at the same time so at least I will have company this week.  My insomnia is a nightmare at the moment but I found the cure last night!!!  Night nurse lol.  I bought it yesterday for my cold and it completely knocked me out last night for 8 hours.  I woke up this morning and felt great so hopefully it will do the same again tonight.  Jamie's concert went well and got all tearful when he did his bit.  The meeting at playgroup went okay although again got all emotional when I did my little goodbye bit but I will still help them out (its really my friend and I that run it so I think she would be lost without me lol - she says I can't leave).  Anyway, glad its Friday tomorrow as I dont work Fridays if I can avoid it so going to beautician in the morning then get my housework done.  My girlfriends are coming over tomorrow night for a drink and a gossip so looking forward to it.

Lynne, so sorry to hear that your dad is to have yet another op!  Thats awful but at I'm glad he is hopeful about it - it might help his positivity?  Bren, glad you and Teri met up.  Helen, glad you had a good birthday and having lots of celebrations to look forward to it.  Hugs Fiona, Patricia, Lesley, Dave & Manda and Ailsa - the garage sounds great. 

I'm sure I have missed someone lol.  Hope Judi is having a great holiday - think she is back this weekend?

Take care penguins.

Gayle xxx

Evening all , bring on tommorow lol but i'm so very sad that Gordon isn't here to see the world cup , he really loved football and i hope he's sat on the side lines in S A and got a front seat to watch it all xx

I've had a lovely day with Aiden , his mum was on nights last night and as his nursery was shut this week she asked me to look after him this morning , so we had a lovely day at the park , but Beth is not happy at all as she was at school , but she does get spoilt too lol .. My builder came back tonight and he is starting work on the 26 th , which will be the week before the charity day and he will also be here through the year anniversary , might not be a bad thing , keep my mind off things (hopefully ) .. Glad your feeling a bit better Gayle . Whats everybody got planned for the weekend ? xx

Take care Lynne xx

Evening, Lynne

Your photos on fb were fab - looks like you both had a good day out.

i'm taking my girlies out for a chinese meal tonight to celebrate alice's birthday, then Sunday is RFL day, ; there will be 9 of us doing it in memory of Alan, and also to give thanks that my friend's son is in remission from NHL. should be good - the weather forecast is just right - dry, sunny with some white cloud. My feet are aching already.

Glad that your builder has given you a date which will span 'the' day - I'm sure, too, that it will help you through it. The build-up is always the worst time, as we all know only too well.

sue xx

Evening everyone.  Gayle I'm glad you had such a good night's sleep and you seem to be feeling a bit better.  Lynne you are working so hard on the charity event - well done to you.  Your photos of your day with Aiden are great.  It'd also really good that there is something they can do for your Dad - we just need to will him to the top of the list as soon as possible.

Helen, Lesley, hope you are having good nights out.  Sue, enjoy your chinese with your daughters.  I am doing a RFL on Sunday as well.  There are 5 of us doing it in Chris's memory.  Looks like we will have a dry day as well.  We both need to post some photos afterwards. 

Lynne I'm glad you have a start date from your builder.  Mine should drop my quote off in a few days.  I seem to have ground to a halt with the garage for now. The meter man couldn't move the meter today.  British Gas gave me completely the wrong information and I need to do a bit more work  before it can be moved.  It might take up to 8 weeks to get it moved now.  That will slow everything else down but I have had a look and maybe it will still all be done by the end of August.  I suppose there was no rush in the first place.  My bench didn't arrive on Thursday either as they didn't have any stock.  They rand me and hours & a half into my day off to tell me.  I was beside myself - but that never makes any difference does it??  Apparently it is coming tomorrow instead - we will see!!

Well I think I will go a pour a nice weekend drink and watch a bit of big brother.  I'm out at a local rugby club to watch the game tomorrow.  Hope everyone has a great weekend.  Take care.  Ailsa xxx  PS - Teri, Bren - great pictures.  I'm so glad there has been an international penguin meet. xx

Evening everyone xx

Gayle Paul always swore by night nurse for a good night s sleep lol!! Glad you got some sleep xx

Lynne maybe you re right and having the builder there over the anniversary and your fundraising day will definitely keep you busy xx

Lesley have a lovely night tonight. Ailsa I m not out tonight, been doing the garden, had tea with Liam and now watching big brother. Bedtime soon I think, been a busy week. Got my friend coming round tomorrow night to watch the game and getting a takeaway. Looking forward to it xxx

Good luck everyone with your races on Sunday xx

Come on England!!! I ve also got them in the sweep stake in work so more reason to cheer he he!!

Judi hope you ve had a great holiday xxx

Teri and Bren the photos are fab!!

Have a good night everyone

Helen xxx

Penguns go international!  Well done Teri and Bren, lovely photo's, so glad you met up xxxx 

Ailsa, Lynne all this talk of building work, you are both so busy and good, wel done.  I have lots of things I'd like to do here but Daniels place is taking up all resources at the moment and anyway I had enough of work n the house last year with the major repairs on the plumbing etc and the recarpeting and redecoration of the hall stairs and landing.  One day I will get it all done and sorted and it will be lovely and I hope by then I will have my new life sorted and people to share it with, til then it doesn't really matter when it's just me here.

Gayle glad the night nurse helped you sleep, never works for me just tastes green and horrible, I'd better stick to the Baileys I guess. 

Well at the mention of Baileys I think I'd better toddle off to bed with a wee dram, hope you are all well and can sleep tonight, not sure how I will be it's not as bad as at first, but not as good as I'd got as I think having Sam move out and being alone in the house is disturbing my sleeping a bit at the moment. Ah well just have to get used to something else won't I?  Sleep tight penguins, love and hugs to you all xxxxxx

Morning all

Yes had a lovely girlie night out, very tired now though, doesn't matter how late I go to bed, I always wake up at roughly the same time.  :-( still it was worth it!

Teri and Bren's pics on FB, really lovely, so nice to meet up with friends on here.

Ailsa, hope the RFL goes well and for you too Sue.

Hope you are soon back to your bubbly self Gayle, I am afraid Night Nurse never did it for me either, only had it once when I had flu, only had that once too, it made me feel dizzy.

Helen, hope you enjoy your weekend, you will be glued to tv watching footie! I drew Spain in sweepstake and am told they are pretty good team to have picked, well you will all have to keep me informed as I would rather look through Argos catalogue than watch football!!!!!  Hmmm, I suppose I could just about stay in the room if football was on but only just, lol.

I have Daniel for the weekend, so will be really tired by tomorrow, let him sleep through tonight please!

Have a lovey day all. xxxx  Love to all I have not mentioned. xx

Morning girls

I've not been around much recently - too much depressing news from Chez T.....!!!!!  Builders are not the tidiest of workers and I find myself cleaning up long after they have gone home!!!  Sorry I don't want to put the dampeners on those of you about to embark on building works.  The ones working here are not at my request - but our landlord's........so we just have to put up with it!!!!!!!  But I won't bore you with all that................

I too am doing RfL tomorrow afternoon - at Pontefract.........My sister and nieces are not going to be there this year so I'm taking Percy (Penelope) Penguin for company - he's been re-named 'Penelope' and will be wearing a pink ribbon just so that (s)he can take part!!!!!

I hope you all have lovely things to do this weekend........and you have plenty of sunshine too.............

Love and ((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))) to you all

Dot xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx