My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Evening xxx

Quick one before I go to bed. Ailsa well done on your run xxx Glad you met up with others too xx

Judi you re doing a great job, what you doing for your birthday??

Teri dont beat yourself up thinking we re all doing better than you, we ve been there and done the same as you. Like said if you read back from beginning of thread I m sure you ll read a lot of how you re feeling now, a lot of us kept so busy to just `get through` the days. Still do to a degree but things do get more enjoyable in a different kind of way but like Lynne experienced tonight things come back and hit you to the floor again when you re not expecting it xx One day at a time and as Nemo says `just keep swimming!!!!`

Lynne hope you had a good day x

I had a lovely weekend, I ve met a lovely person I ve been spending a bit of time with so just seeing how it all goes. Enough said lol xxx

Night everyone, hope you sleep well

Helen xxx

Sorry Fiona, glad you re feeling bit better. I ve been out in the garden after work tonight too xx

Patrica hope you re ok and work is alright too xx

Hugs to everyone I ve not mentioned, thinking of you all too xxx

Helen xxx

Hi - just before I go to bed could not resist checking on all of you.  I'm glad yu had a lovely weekend Helen x

Lynne I too have been on facebook and sending you lots of love xxx

Rosemary it sounds like Sams first day at college was exhausting but I bet the days will start to get easier now the first one is done.

Teri the others have said just the same as I would say - don't be so hard on yourself.  You are doing very well and it is still very early.  I have past a year now but now feel I really lack the motivation to get much joy out of most things.  I go through the motions but the sparkle seems to have goone from everything.  Try to read some of our early posts and then you will hopefully know you are not alone so long as you keep popping in to see us on here.  Thinking about you xxx

Gayle, Judi, Sue, Dave and anyone I have missed and anyone else looking in - hope you are okay this evening.  Take care everyone.  Ailsa xx

Fiona - I'm glad you are feeling a little better and that Charlie has something from the doctor to help him as well.  Take care.  Ailsa xx

hi

I am home again from Ottawa this time.  It was a good visit and most of the family made it there this afternoon for BIL's 50th birthday if only for a few hours it was nice to see them all.  I had to leave to catch the plane home which was great, small plane only 8 passengers a quick hour flight and landed at the airport near home where my car was parked.  Such an easy way to travel, wish I could go more places from there but they don't fly many places.  Max, my puppy was waiting at home so I didn't even need to pick him up and he is worn out from playing with 4 children all weekend.  I just have to get the cat tomorrow on the way home from work.

It was a good visit with BIL and SIL, they made me welcome and took care of me which is something that I badly need from time to time.  We had a few car tours around the Parliament Buildings and some beautiful scenery and parks.  I have a few pics I will post maybe on the weekend.  All in all a nice getaway long weekend.  Not looking forward to reality getting back to work tomorrow but I will get through the day and hopefully get some rest tomorrow night.

So I am up right now and can get on the outside of the huddle for all of you who are needing support.  I imagine next weekend will be much different but for now, just huddle inside and I will be on the outside.  Have to go back and read the posts but not tonight.  This penguin is sitting in bed with her 85 pound furry foot warmer on her feet, very hot in the house tonight also so will be kicking him off soon.

have a good night

Welcome back Bren. So glad the weekend was a good one for you. I hope the coming week is just as good.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Happy birthday Judi hope you've had a good day xxx

 Thank you all for your support last night , i cant believe things hit me as hard as they did . Whilst looking for my work ID i came across the first photo that Gordon and i ever had taken and as i was sobbing and putting it away i came across Gordons last photo , it was all to much but although i had a very bad night and didn't sleep much i've had a good day at work and as most of you know about my little gaff at the garage , but on my defence if the car wasn't being tested today i probably wouldn't have mentioned that i was driving almost horizontal , when they couldn;t find a fault with it the garage man asked me to show him what i was doing , when he pointed out i was reclining it he could hardly keep a straight face , but he was very nice bless . oh well its made a few of you smile and that is always good xx Welcome back Bren . I'll be back later xxxx

dear lynne,

Thanks for giving us a giggle. hope you're feeling a lot better today.

xxx

Thanks Sue i'm fine today and glad i gave you a giggle , your picture has given me one lol xxxx

Evening to everyone, Hope everyone is doing ok tonight.  I have had a very upsetting day another boy i was at school with has lost his fight with cancer yesterday he was only 52yrs old and it has brought back all the  bad memories once again. He has a sixteen year old girl all so sad. They gave him 18 months and that is just what he has had. Teri sending you hugs and i can't say anymore as what has been said already but just keep posting.  Had Charlie this morning he has a really bad wheeze so hopefully the medicine will start to work soon, he still had smiles for his granny. Judi i hope you have had a good birthday. Well i think it's bed for me. Fiona xxxxxxxxxx