My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Oh Gayle, what a nightmare, but you were all full of the British spirit and kept each other going for most of the way.  I wish I'd known where you were, we are only an hour from London by train, you could have come here to recover overnight, never mind I'm glad you are safe home and the family are on their way. xxxx

Bren well done on getting going with the group and sorting out all the tools and stuff. I think the sorting out of stuff, although hard to do and brings back so many memories, also helps as it is a practical thing whereas all we have been through most of the time we were helpless and couldn't do anything.  Hope the dog meeting and sitting goes well, what sort of dogs?

Lynne, how is Dad?  Sounds like the drums are going to a very good home, Gordon would indeed be pleased to think a young lad will benefit and probably love them just as much as he did. Glad work was a bit better too.

Patricia you're right, I know a lot goes on (she is 23 after all) and it is awkward still living at home etc but parents it seems are just meant to deal with all this now and treat it as normal.  Samantha did come down a little later, very red faced and said "About earlier mum it wasn't what you thought" (an odd line I thought) I toild her I didn't really need any detail thanks but I promised I wouldn't be going in again.  Bless her she then burst into tears and needed a hug, seems that it wasn't quite what I thought and there are problems "in that department"...... even more what I don't need to hear!  Whatever next do you think?

Just been out and treated the garden and the veggie allottment with Nemaslug, it's a six weekly treatment that you water in and it stops the slugs before they can get going and breeding and stuff and before they get the plants!  I used it last year and it does seem to work so can recommend it if anyone has a slug problem.  Also we've been putting up some bark screening along the fence to try and stop the dogs barking at the neighbours every time they walk up or down their drive, also it has made it a lot more "private" in the garden as the hedge is quite open until the leaves come through properly (hazel and beech).  Quite pleased with ourselves (Sam and me) as Daniel said he would help but we didn't know when that would be so we just got stuck in.

Ailsa, hope all is going well with the move, can't wait til we meet now, we must sort out the final details on timings and exactly where we should do the hugging and kissing bit! 

Judi has the snow cleared yet, it still looks a bit bleak weatherwise up your way (mind you that goes for half of you on this thread, I feel quite immigrtational down here.... Dave where are you?????  And Sue you are southwest aren't you?)  Where do you mum and dad come from Judi, I know they have had problems getting to you for ages now but have missed just where they were coming from.

Dottee, Fiona, Helen, John, Dave, Julie, Jenni, Lesley, Manda and all the penguins, sending you love and hugs and huddles hope your Friday nights are going well and a good weekend can be enjoyed. xxxxxx

Welcome back gayle. I am exhausted just reading about your epic journey.  I hope you recover soon.

Hope that everyone enjoys their weekend.

As for me, just call me 'hop along cassidy' the trouble is I don't know which leg to hop on. My left knee is really painful and has been for the past week. Now my little toe on my right foot has turned black and is really painful because I stubbed it on the iron feet of the ironing board.  Well no-one asked it to stand where I was going to put my foot did they? I just cannot believe how clumsy I have become lately. Is it because my brain is playing 'lets see how miserable I can make her' games?? Oh well. I better stop moaning and pull myself together.

Be kind to yourselves and enjoy the reasonable weather while we have it.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Morning everyone

Lovely day here again.

Gayle gad you re home at last xx

Lynne hope you have a lovely day

Ailsa glad you enjoyed Liverpool and good luck with Becky`s move

Rosemary I know a bit about how you feel, I ve felt that with my son and his girlfriend a bit. Young love eh!!

Patricia sorry to hear you re all aches and pains, hope you feel better soon x

I went to a friends wedding last night, we had a great night then a few of us headed off into town to a bar that has live music on. I  saw a few of Paul s friends that I hadnt seen for a while and it got a bit emotional!! Ooops!! The fellas are worse than the girls sometimes. Tried to hold it together but few tears xx  Going shopping today then maybe a bit of gardening and a quiet night in tonight. Meeting a friend tomorrow for the afternoon so a busy weekend ahead.

Whats everyone else doing today!! Hope you re all ok, we re still quiet this week. Hopefully its because of the good weather, well apart from Judi that is lol!! Sorry Judi xx

Helen xx

And Ladies and Gentlemen!!

We have just gone past our 5000th post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Congratulations everyone xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Morning everyone,

Thanks for all the good wishes - you all keep me going.  I am still like a zombie lol and having quite a few blonde moments but at least I have a good excuse!

But now that I am back the manic starts again!  Off out shortly to pick up my car which is still at the airport, then then dog who is still in the kennels and then off out tonight to do a fundraiser at the playgroup.  We are having a psychic night so that will be interesting!  Then tomorrow I have an ironing that would make you cry and a mountain of work to get through.  I can´t face it today though but will need to do it tomorrow. 

Hope you all have a good weekend

Gayle xxx

Hi everyone - well what a catch up I have had to do.  Most importantly HELLO GAYLE .... talk about a journey. I am SO proud of you hun, and I think you are quite right about the fact that this will give you back a whole load of confidence.  If you can manage that I think that you can mange just about anything else that comes your way hun. 

Helen, glad you had a lovely evening, and yes you are right - sometimes it is the men that can in fact get themselves and make you the most emotional.   And I am happy that the sun is shining for most of you ..... it is above freezing here, and that is something!!  My mum and dad live just on the border of England and North Wales, about thirty miles south of Chester.  So it is about 420 mile drive up to me .. not a short hop ..... unless your name is Gayle!  So yes Rosemary, if I came to live near you then it would be far easier for them to come and see me - or I could go up to them on the sit on mower... teehee.  

Patrica, you do sound as if you are in the wars.  Look after yourself and do a little self-cosseting I think.  Aisla, you have a busy few weeks ahead don't you.  Bex and Dec will be with you soon, how wonderful. 

Lynne, I actually spent most of today driving round looking at different houses etc, just to get an idea of what I may like.  not actually viewing any, but weighing up streets etc.  I used to work for a surveyor/valuer who I am going to phone on Monday and bribe him with a pint if he will come and give me an idea of what mine might fetch.  So still thinking that way at the moment, but like you - I am a great believer that eventually my brain will stop Morris Dancing and let me know what I should do!

Bren, I am so glad that you have had a better week, and if the sunshine continues then you can sit out more and have the dogs around you there will be a little ray of brightness each day that you can focus on.  Your talk of sorting out the tools actually made me think "Do I REALLY want to have to pack up everything and sort out the garage, the shed etc!!

Fiona, have you been working again this weekend?  What a kiddie Kim is to have fixed your computer.  How is Darren getting on?

Teri, how are things hun?  I have been thinking about you and all the stress that is going on around you at the moment - sending massive, squishy hugs.  Sue, I loved your sunshine flower - I am finally, finally beginning to appreciate weekends.  I arranged for two friends to come round for supper last night and I think that is maybe the way to go for me to avoid the "Friday evening blues". 

Boy's passport arrived here today.  And all I can say is he must be the LEAST vain person I have ever met.  I had asked him if his photo was nice as he would have to live with it until he was 31.  "Mum, it's just a photo, if it gets me through borders and on holiday where's the problem"  And oh how right he was ....... it is DREADFUL ..... he looks like he hasn't slept for about five weeks!!  I have never seen such dark circles under anyones eyes!  But at least it is here - so I think it is only six or seven weeks until we are off. 

Loads of love to everyone I have undoubtedly missed out.  Judi xxxx

Judi, where are you going on your holiday?

Morning all

Sorry have not been on for a while. I enjoyed my stay at the caravan but as usual found it difficult to come home to reality. I've not been online much over the last week or so, I seem to find it hard to fit everything in when I'm at work. I'm trying to get to the gym two or three times each week, have not picked up any knitting in ages!

Well the rain is back but at least we have had a lovely week or so sunshine. I have booked a weeks holiday in August to Madeira, I have been before and know my mum and I will have a very relaxing week of 5* treatment and sun!

Patricia, have been reading a book about a lady who says her life has been transformed by angels and while a part of me remains sceptical, a lot of what she said hit home with me. Mostly about inner calm and peace, I think I have been looking around for things/people to make me feel better instead of looking within myself and trying to still my mind until I feel calm. She talks about meditation a lot, I had a couple of tries at it but I felt so calm that I fell asleep instead of finding answers to my questions lol! However one of the times I fell asleep, I had a lovely dream about Colin, the first of it's kind, so I didn't mind at all.  :-)

Gayle, glad to hear you are at last back in the UK, what about your boys are they still with your parents?

Anyway just wanted to say hello to everyone.  xxx   Lesley

Morning Lesley and everyone

Good to hear from you Lesley, been thinking about you. Your holiday sounds lovely, that is on my list of things to do just not sure who with lol?? Dont think Liam will be interested this year but maybe Nat will.Your meditation sounds interesting and what a lovely bonus to have a dream about Colin xx

Judi you made me laugh about Boy`s photo, Liam s just had his done. He looks like a convicted criminal LOL!!

Sounds like Lynne and Amanda had a good day yesterday when they finally got there.

Well I had a good day yesterday, went shopping and treated myself to a few tops and some make up then came home and was in the garden until 7.30. Just as well I did it yesterday as it is wet here this morning. Liam was home for a bit last night so that was nice too x

I have got a mountain of ironing this morning then off to meet a friend this afternoon for a coffee and maybe something to eat.

Hope everyone else is ok today, what you all doing?

Helen xxx

Morning all , so glad you've posted again Lesley , Manda and i was saying yesterday how worried we was about you , we know how up and down we all can be , you take care and you know where we all are , and we haven;t seen pics of your new hair cut yet lol XXX Helen where indeed has the sun gone , typical i was either sat on a train or resturant (or pub) and it was really lovely yesterday , but at least we could have a walk in york without getting wet . By coincidence another lady off here , usually the bereaved spouse thread was there , (Ovadene ) Sharon and it was lovely to meet her, what a small world She knew more about me lol than i did her but i'm sure i'll keep up with her posts now . ..

Well in typical Lynne style i managed to book a day  return but actually booked the train for the next day , know idea how i did that lol , but i just got on a train anyway then managed to sit in first class lol , got thrown out of there (in a nice way ) but they didn't really look that closely then at my ticket lol .. My dad picked me up at the station  and dropped me off at my sisters pub but you'll be proud of me i only stayed for 2 and i was tucked up in bed for 11 . I've got the lads for lunch today as by coincidence the girls we're on a hen party in York mast night but they've asked me to put them a lunch out and they will have it whan they get back , cant miss that can they lol .. Any way sis picking me up in 5 mins , we'll go and see dad  .. I'll be back later to catch up xx

 Take care  Lynne xxx