My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Well, girls and boy, i have signed up for Race for Life in bristol on june 13th. Alice is doing it with me, as ar Helen, claire (dIL), Ruby (granddaughter), and 3 colleagues from school.

Hmph.  Am aching in anticipation.      napoleon will go as well. he is not happy, but will have to get over himself.   we have a just-giving page   - 

www.raceforlifesponsorme.org

napoleon is training with his friends.

Sue xx

nice one Sue! have paid your page a visit... xx

Sue and Napoleon  xxxxx

Evening all , well we are all quiet on here arn't we , i think its cos we are all busy busy busy , and with Ailsa and Gayle being away our numbers are down .. Well done Sue on the RFL , i'm doing ours the sunday after the charity day so at least 2 weekends are taken up .. I

've pm'd Fiona so she also knows what i'm doing , i'm still convinced i'vemade the right decision to stay and things are i progress to get the work done we'd planned to do ..

 Dad went to the hospital but they're not sure what to do as his mouth is still really swollen , they've put him on 2 weeks of antibiotics to see if things settle down any , hopefully they will ..  Well will Gayle ever get home , seems like she's having a ball with her traveling companions tho , you go girl lol .. Helen , hope your week is going ok with the little ones..

 I've been a little upset at the moment  as a friends husband is in the hospice and very close to the end . When i was talking to my friend i was getting quite panicky , i felt so sorry for her as i know what she has got to face , she looks to me for help , how can i tell her nothing will help her to start with .

 Anyway i'll be having a read back at the posts as i'm not taking anything in ..

Take care all Lynne xxxx

Oh Lynne that is so hard for you, it brings it all back and, as you say, you know what she has to face.  You don't tell her that nothing will help you just tell her you are there for her whenever she needs it.  Nothing will take the feelings away, nothing can change what happens but having a friend (and having you lot on here) does help, it helps you cope, it helps you get up every day and get through every day, it just can't make it any different but maybe it makes it a bit better.  Hugs and more hugs and hugs for her too, have you suggested she comes on the Mac site at all?

Your poor dad too Lynne, Just a suggestion how about some arnica homeopathic tablets, they help with swelling and bruising and won't harm at all, he doesn't need to try and swallow them as they dissolve in the mouth. Hug for him too (I am feeling VERY huggy tonight)

Hope things are moving better for Gayle now, is there and update on her progress?  I think I've missed a page somewhere, also I read heaps just now but like you Lynne things aren;t going in.  It's Daniel's 20th birthday today and we have had a good day, lunch here with the in-laws and lots of time with Dan (which is unusual these days), but I saw him taking time out quietly in Steve's garden and looking at his memorial stone (where the ashes are too) and I know how much he is hurting, which of course has really set me off, as if I needed anything.  We have had some time together and some hugs this evening, but looked in on Facebook and his status broke my heart bless him, he misses his dad so much.

So head all over the place, emotions shot to pieces yet again, looks like a night on the ledge coming up folks - the sunset is beautiful, but it's a bit nippy out there, so shall I light the fire in the lounge and we could toast crumpets (or marshmallows if you like them) and drink hot chocolate there instead?  Love to you all, shuffle together for a big, snuggly huddle xxxxxxxxxxxx

Sue
Hi there. I havent posted on this thread for a while but I read all the posts. Bristol is going to be busy over the next few months
My son and I are running the Bristol 10k for St Peters Hospice on the 9th of May. All of Sharons (my beloved wife who left me three months ago from Pancreatic Cancer)  friends are doing the Race for Life (again for St Peters) with a lunch afterwards that my son Mike and I have been invited to in memory of Sharon. Our nieces are doing the Night Walk in July and I have signed up for the half marathon in September> I havent run for years so lots of effort going in and lots of pain - but at least its just physical. Good luck to you all with your efforts. I live 5 minutes from the Downs so I will be there supporting you>
As everyone says it doesnt get any easier.As I say it is now three months since my life changed forever and each day is a struggle. Everything around me reminds me of Sharon and the good times and laffs and what I dont have anymore.
Again good luck to you and your "team" for the Race for Life
John

Hi Again , nice to hear from you again John , and well done on the run , keep us updated ... Rosemary i will get dad some of what you suggested , you also know just what to try and i appriciate it thank you .. Yes thats what i've told my friend , i'll be going to see her when she's ready , she doesn't have internet at the moment but when she does i will direct her here .. Gayle is on a train to paris , (i've just heard fron her ) she's hoping to get the euro star to ,london and then train to glasgow and then Colin will pick her up. Shes having quite a adventure , cant wait to hear all about it lol xxxxxx

Bug higs to Lynne and Rosemary ((((((((((()))))))))))))))

Hot chocolate and marshmallows coming up xxx I m just having a cheeky glass of Rose before bed, just one mind!! Good me xx

Hugs to Dan too, know what sons are like as big and daft as they are!! Got one here too xxx They still need a hug ((((()))))))

Lynne it does bring it all back, you look after you too xxx

My little ones at work are angels, had another good day with them all. We planted grass seed last week and having a lovely lawn inside lol xxx Going to let them loose with scissors on it tomorrow!! Made salt dough today and we were all lovely and sticky!! Great fun!

I m feeling pretty ok at the mo, so enjoying it while it lasts. Let me look after all of you tonight xxx

Hope Gayle is ok and cant wait to hear about her adventures.

How is everyone else

Off to bed soon, sleep well everyone

Helen xxx

Hi everyone

As you say Lynne, we all seem a little quiet at the moment.  I think that you sent your moving vibes down to me when they left you!  I seem to be spending a huge amount of time browsing houses at the moment.  I live in a two storey flat (I guess it would be classed as a maisonette in England) and although it is very nice I keep thinking how nice it would be to have a back door that just opened into the garden both for me an dthe dogs, so am doing a bit of investigating.  Property in Aberdeen is exhorbitantly expensive and the system here is a little different as Fiona and Gayle could tell you.  When you have offered for a house you can't 'back out' that is it, you have offered to buy it so buy it you will.  Which means I would have to sell this first - decisions, decisions heh Lynne!!

I so hope that you dad starts to improve soon Lynne, he is some soldier isn't he.  Rosemary - our boys are so precious and I think so miss their role models don't they.  Massive squishy hugs for Daniel from his Auntie Judes - that should make him squirm!   My Boy managed to have an appointment at the Passport Office today ... hurrah ... so it looks like I won't be going to Greece on my own. 

Helen, glad to hear that you are having good days with your wee ones, send them round here to cut my bit of grass with their scissors if you like!  Well done Sue on the RFL and John too. 

I have a friend whose Gran died a few weeks ago and she has taken it very hard.  She was 95 and had lived a wonderful life, healthy to the end, the last couple of years in a fantastic home that arranged tea dances and visits to Bingo etc.  My friend has taken it very hard as she visited every week.  But I have to admit that there has a bit of awkwardness recently.  She was not very happy that I didn't write more in the card I sent her - she said "I thought you out of everyone would have written some words of comfort".  I wanted to say - "I am so sorry but I don't have any words of comfort, I have a shoulder for you to cry on and a hug whenever you wish, but words of comfort ...  they fail me every time".  I am sure we will get past it, but I think I have obviously let her down. 

Well what about our girl Gayle - she deserves a medal for what she has coped with doesn't she.  Patricia you must be delighted that you got home before all this started. 

Have a bit of a headache tonight so am going to convince the dogs that an early night is the answer and pop off to bed. 

Night all - Judi xxxx

Obviously this site hates me this morning. I have written and lost two long posts so I will just say good morning to everyone and hope that you all have the best day that you can.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x