My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Hello All

Have to say that I too am feeling down about Valentines day... We didn't do anything special, but I would always make something nice for tea and Miles used to send me the loveliest cards. Just sick of seeing it everywhere at the moment, one of the disadvantages of working in the town centre I suppose.

I haven't been to Liverpool for years, but I remember it being a great place to shop!

Have had a bit of a bad weekend, H had a bit of a meltdown but I'm glad in some ways... She is so stoic and I worry that she isn't letting her grief out. Anyway, we talked and looked at photo's, had lots of tears and plenty of hugs - think it probably did us both good. We are off on holiday next week and think that although we are both really in need of the time away from everything (and everyone) it's so hard not to feel guilty about going away without Miles. I know he would want us to, and will be there with us - it's weird how ready we are to torture ourselves isn't it?

Hope everyone has had a reasonable day.

Manda xx

 Manda, you need to migrate to the centre of the huddle for a while x x x

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Evening girls - I've shuffled out of the middle (still buoyed up by Alan's 'surprise' yesterday) so there's plenty of room for all those that need it - and Sue that includes you too!!!!!  My arms are stretched as far as they will go - so can someone grab hold to help me keep the huddle together??  Love and lots of ((((bug higs)))) to comfort you all...........Dot xxxxxxxxxxxx

Dear Dot,

Thank you

xx

Grabbing hold Dottee but please can you just stretch a bit further I can't quite reach x x x

ooohhh....aaahhhhh....eeeehhhh.......there can you reach now??

Aaaahhhhh....... gotcha...  now hold on tight x x x

Hi everyone.  Patricia, you and Dot make me smile.  I love the way you write.  Glad you've caught hold of each now to keep us all in.  Well done Sue going to blood doners - reminded me I haven't been for ages.  I thought of it a week ago and then it went clean out of my mind again.  I need to find out when there is a session near me.

Helen - glad to hear Liverpool is a good place to shop, you too Manda.  I am really excited about going.  I don't think I can be bothered with a crowded gym either.  I had my pilates class tonight but there are only half a dozen of us there so it isn't crowded at all.

Manda, Rosemary and Lesley I think as well - Valentines day is still bugging me today.  Like most of you including Helen, Chris & I just used the day as a good excuse to treat each other a bit.  I think I am having a bigger problem with the 'this time last year thing' because of Valentines day to be truthful.  We were told on the 11th Feb last year that Chris wasn't going to get better so by Valentines day we were in a bit of an emotional state.  Chris got me a lovely card and wrote a special message in it.  I think I need to employ some diversion tactics if I can in the next few weeks to stop me dwelling on this time last year so I need some hot tips for fun things to do please.

Fiona I hope you are all ready for your trip to London.  I'm sure you will enjoy your break away with H as well Manda.

It is nice that you had a calm weekend Lesley and your shopping trip with your daughter sounds great.  Take care everyone.  Love from Ailsa xxx

Ailsa, try this site it may help you to find a donation centre. http://www.blood.co.uk/ 

I have no 'fun' ideas to help you through the 'this time last year' time. Sorry. if I think of anything I shall let you know.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Good morning

I don't think it helps that Valentines day falls at weekend this year, if it was mid-week most of us would work through it but the way it is it will be pushed in our faces. Can't even escape to family as all in couples and will want to do their thing. They probably would accommodate me but I won't ask it does not seem fair to spoil their fun.

Will you be away over Valentines Manda?

Ailsa, I am dreading August onwards because of the 'this time last year' thing. I wish I could be of more help, I think it's just something we all have to get through. Such a shame we don't all live closer to each other we could have done something together this weekend.

Well must get moving soon. Talk of redundancies still rife at work. I can't find it in me to actually be bothered, maybe it would be a good thing, it would give me the push I need to try something new. i am finding it hard at work, feel like I am on the outside looking in somehow.

Hugs to all, Lesley xx