My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Evening all - Sue - sorry to hear you've been unwell - sending you special ((((((((((((hugs))))))))))) to make you feel better!!!  Patricia - just returning all the (((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))) you've sent me this past few days..........you know where I am if you want a shoulder to lean on or a tissue or two..............Esme - it sounds like you and your family need lots of (((((((hugs))))))) right now.............so here's lots (((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))...... Oh gosh.........can't remember who else is doing what...........so more ((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))) for you all  Dot xxxxxxxxxxx

Thanks to you all for your kind thoughts and hugs.(looking out for Archangel Michael - thanks Esme)

I have ordered my sky lanterns today so hope they get here soon.  what a great idea Sue bless you x x x

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

to all my dear friends on here

have a good weekend

sue x

Hi guys

Well I started catching up on everyone's posts with the intention of remembering it all and by the third was post knew that the chances were very slim!  Dave, hope the boys are feeling a little better and I am so glad that you went to your night out.  Good on you for talking about NIc and managing so well.  Esme hun, what a time you are having - I have spoken to Joe and Kat, and although they are feeling very sorry for themselves (I will explain that in a minute) they said to send you a big lick.

Arrgghh...... Mandy or Lesley - who is going to the Helen Schoool of Heels ...  told you I wouldn't remember ... as everyone has said, I hope that your night out goes ok.  Listen to your Aunty Lynne about going out, she is a very wise lady ...... if slightly clumsy!!  Ah now, I think it is Lesley cos I think I am right in thinking that poor Mandy is getting over the dreaded lurgy.

My sky candles have arrived, they look super - like the rest of you I am so looking forward to feeling that we are all together sending our love and messages skywards.  Patricia hun - not a good few days ahead of you, you know we are all thinking of you and sending loving cyber vibes your way.  Sue, duvet day for you I think.  Lynne - sand, bark, chippings - the council will be getting you to write the gold standard soon.  Hope the rain stops and that you can make Gordon's special place look as lovely as I know you would like.

Having been fed like kings for the last week the poor mutts still had to both go in for teeth surgery this week.  Most rescue ex-racing greyhounds have trouble with their gnashers and need some attention eventually and although I didn't really wnat to put them through it the time had come it was necessary.  They have to get a general anesthetic so when I picked them up from the vets a sorrier pair you have never seen - and when I took them out for a wee before bed poor old Joey tried to cock his leg, the other one just couldn't take the weight and he ended up in an undignified heap on the gound just looking up at me, with his toungue lolling out of the side of his toothless mouth, with eyes that where saying "What happened there mum?"  Anyway, twenty-four hours later and they are both almost back to normal and now on chicken and rice for tea and porridge for breakfast!!!!

Am really, really, really going to think about Christmas shopping this weekend.  You will notice I deliberately said think about, not actually do any! 

Sorry for leaving people out, never intentional. Love to all and everyone of you.  Judi xxx

Wow, you were all busy on here last night, 3 pages of posts!!

Well I am glad I went out, that is another first over with but I can't pretend I enjoyed it. I felt so lonely and a bit panicky, so many people there enjoying themselves. I was OK for about 4 hours then a guy started telling jokes about women, normally it wouldn't bother me but as he didn't know me he said "why do men normally die younger then women? Because they want to". Everyone in our group went silent, I felt awful. Then there waas that awful pause before someone laughed for his sake, he looked a bit taken aback that no-one had got his joke. Anyway I came home shortly after that. Had a cry when I got in, hate coming home to my empty house but then at midnight my daughter rang to check I had got in safetly, so that made me laugh, I like it when she checks up on me though, makes me feel wanted and protected still. So a bit of a mixed bag, I managed to stay upright on my heels though! Thanks everyone for your good wishes.

Seems like we are all getting the "so, are you ready for Christmas?" statement, it is easier just to smile and say nearly, whoever said that is right.

This evening will be another first, I am going to try to cook duck for my dinner. I did not really cook before. As Colin was a chef, he did most of the cooking. So it will either be duck for dinner or a bowl of cheerios depending on the outcome!!

Hope everyone has a good day, love the angel pics. xxxx

well done for going out! You say you were ok for the first 4 hours - that's amazing! I'm further down the line than you, and there's no way i could go out for 4 hours!!!! brill. Unfortunately when someone like the guy you came across last night starts telling 'jokes'  it's sooo hard;upsetting for you and embarrassing for everyone else. i have cultivated a very good line in 'dirty looks' over the years and it's amazing what a combination of raised eyebrows and apiercing glance can do!!! 

  always worth a try!

Sue x

Wel done Lesley , another first out the way , so nice of your daughter to "check up on you " my kids do that too , ifeel like we've gone full circle and there doing the worrying over me now , butlike you say you do feel kinda protected so thats nice . Hope your feeling a bit better today Sue and the bug has cleared up now xx Judi Ha Ha yes i'm sure the cemetery workers would have something to say to me if they saw what i keep putting down , but today i've put something more natural down , my daughter has been to get her christmas tree , and whilst she was there she picked up a bag of bark /chippings and that looks a lot better now its down . Cant wait for tommorow to really sort it out , please dontlet it rain . I've got a kiddies birthday party this afternoon or i would do it now . Its my little great neices party and all my kids are going so i'll go and take some photos xx

Hope everybody is ahving a pleasant weekend , Helen hae you been for more shoes ?

Talk again later

Lynne xxxxxxxx

Hi, our Lynne

Bug hasn't disapperared, but am feeling a bit better, but shall we just say i am somewhat unreliable - enough information, i think!

Have just been down to cemetery, and taken a plant with beautiful berries on it - a solanum.

it looks lovely; i find that cut flowers don't last 2 minutes in this weather, so i have a pot of heathers, one of violas and now the solanum, together with the lantern. Looks good.

The way i felt this morning, it was a choice between the weekly shop or the cemetery - no contest! didn't have the energy or the willpower for both, so cemetery won hands down.

sue x

WHY WONT MY PICTURE PRINT??? WILL TRY AGAIN.

Yes Sue cemmy would win with me hands down lol i'm on my way to take care of you xxxxxxxxxx