Podcasts with Karen Sutton. My Husband died- now what ?

It's not getting better for me either. I don't see anyone for days sometimes and the loneliness is getting harder to bear. I try to contact people but they're all too busy to see me or even chat. I feel like a social outcast. Wish I knew what to do to find some purpose in life, but I'm at a loss. I'll try those podcasts. I've tried others but it's not the same as having someone who cares is it? This has been a very bad day, the worst for a while. However are we meant to live like this? 

Yesterday, was horrendous and I was very angry, and shouted at our son. I was missing my husband, and felt this rage come over me. I haven’t been sleeping well, and my coping skills were reduced. Today, I forced myself to go out, as I was feeling really low. One of my visits was to the library, to get some new books. Apparently, I had a fine of £12, which I had not paid. I thought I had. When the lovely lady mentioned it, I burst into tears, and told her my husband had died. She offered me a box of tissues, and was very kind. For some reason, it really helped. Perhaps, it was the validation of grief. I have just slept for three hours, and feel a bit more human. Our lovely son, has accepted my apology. Hugs to all. Kate.xxx

I think if just one person is kind and tries to understand it makes a real difference. I'm hurt and shocked that so many people seem to think I'm fine after just six months. That feels heartless and insensitive. These bad days seem to come out of nowhere; they drag you right down. Let's hope we all feel a bit better soon xx

I do read her weekly email and Ive listened to some of her podcasts. I dont think im making much progress at the moment. I am busy, I am going out, but its largely superficial and a way to be occupied. Whether new friendships will grow, I dont know. 

I find the same, spirit, with everyone being busy, ive tried 3 times to meet one friend but shes cancelled every time. I know it cant be helped as she is caring for a poorly mum which I do understand, it just brings me down again when I had something to look forward to. Then I feel bad for feeling like that. 

And so it goes on. 

I find this too.  Im at 6 months and my own family have been great.  But people like the gp.  I don't think they get it at all.  I asked them to change my tablets as the one I had made me groggy and they've just sent me a text message saying this has been changed for something that I know is much stronger and is used for psychosis.  I just think they've got the wrong idea completely.

Maybe its my explanation of it all right enough ha