Saw this today and felt I needed to hear this, actually made me cry, so sharing for anyone who needs to hear this too...
You need to give yourself more grace.
I know you're being hard on yourself. I know you're judging every breakdown, every canceled plan, every moment you're "not handling it well."
I know you're comparing yourself to who you were before. And you're disappointed that you're not that person anymore.
But you need to stop.
Because what you're going through requires grace. So much grace.
Grace for the days you can't get out of bed. Grace for the times you snap at people who don't deserve it. Grace for forgetting things, for being late, for not following through.
Grace for crying in public. For avoiding places that remind you of them. For not being able to handle things you used to handle easily.
Grace for the fact that some days, just surviving is all you can manage.
You're carrying an impossible weight. You're living through the worst thing that's ever happened to you. You're trying to function in a world that doesn't make sense anymore.
And you're doing it. Badly, maybe. Messily, definitely. But you're doing it.
That deserves grace.
You wouldn't expect someone with a broken leg to run a marathon. You wouldn't judge someone recovering from surgery for needing time to heal.
So why are you judging yourself for struggling with grief?
Grief is an injury. A deep, devastating wound that doesn't heal on anyone else's timeline. And you need to treat yourself like someone who's been hurt.
With gentleness. With patience. With grace.
Stop holding yourself to impossible standards. Stop comparing grief-you to before-you. Stop expecting yourself to function like you did when your world was intact.
You're not the same. And that's okay.
Give yourself permission to be different. To be struggling. To be a work in progress.
Give yourself permission to not be okay.
And when you mess up—when you cancel plans, when you forget things, when you can't handle what you used to handle—give yourself grace.
Not because you're weak. Not because you're failing.
But because you're human. And you're grieving. And that's hard enough without adding self-judgment on top of it.
So be kind to yourself. Be patient with yourself. Be gentle with yourself.
Give yourself the grace you'd give anyone else going through what you're going through.
You deserve it.
Even on the days you don't feel like you do.
Especially on those days.
Written by: Aimee Suyko - In Their Footsteps
#loss #death #grief #grieving #griefsupport #griefjourney
I did a bit more shredding today. Old wage slips, tax crap. A lot of it was close to 20 years old. You have to laugh. 
I agree with you Kate. I am forever finding old mobile phones for some reason he collected these
old keys for what I don't know, phone chargers, usb cables, Spirit levels?? CDs?? (remember them) bags of nails, stanley knives, quite a wee mixture. I admit some of them would be of use- the cables at least if they fit anything but as for the rest?? they'll go in the bin eventually
