Beautiful song about loneliness.

Thank you for sharing this, it made me cry, but also so very beautiful. I agree this is also how I feel day after day.

Xx

Yes, it made me breakdown it's a while since I shed so many tears. It felt like the words were the precise words I've spent 3 years trying to gather in my head. 

This year I've felt the loss of my one true love considerably more difficult to deal with. It's like I'm living a life I haven't subscribed to. Sharon & I had plans to travel & see more of the worldwe were so cruelly & quickly denied this & I cannot understand WHY  It makes me angry

Best wishes to all.

Paul x

Life is so very cruel and I question all the time, why Sam? He was the best man, he was a gentle giant, life and soul. He dedicated his life to children's nursing and teaching. We had financially just become comfortable. We had struggled for many years. We too had plans to travel. Due to errors made by the hospital I now have to navigate this lonely world alone and I have no desire to do so, without him.

Sara xx

Hi Sara, it appears our situations are similar in some ways. In Oct 2020 I took the opportunity of a package + redundancy from my employer. This meant we were both free to travel as we wished. However shortly after Sharon started to be unwell, she saw several Dr's & went from a pulled muscle to being advised she had stage 4 cancer just 7 months later. Like you I now consider my local hospital largely responsible for not diagnosing cancer months earlier.

Despite an amazing older brother, who continues to support totally, & two adults kids + 2 grandkids, I always feel I'm living in another world. I often battle in my head between isolation & socialisation & the former always seems the best option !

Take care & best wishes.

Paul x

This had me sobbing! It's the 2nd time I've heard/seen it. Beautiful and sad at the same time. Sometimes song lyrics or quotes just say it all and hit the nail on the head.

It's just over 2 years for me and the pain still feels as raw. Time has moved on but I'm stuck in this endless nightmare. Like you It's a daily struggle. As for Xmas, dreading it, I don't even know what to do  with myself. We used to go away. Now? Nothing. 

Like you I ask why? I go from extreme sadness to anger, just why??? We had so much more to do especially after we thought he'd beat it and after lockdown. The isolation is real.

hope we all can find some peace, somehow.

Best wishes to you too x

Hi, wouldn't it be so nice to just have a little time of peace in our hearts & minds ! I've forgotten what this is like  If I did I'd likely then worry my darling Sharon would think I've forgotten her, something of course I will never do.

There is nothing in life I wouldn't give to hold her in my arms once more. It feels like the pain of such a huge loss in my life will never go away, certainly it isn't easing  

Best wishes,

Paul x

I hear you, completely. Feels like a surreal awful world we've been left to navigate our way through. And I'm not doing a very good job at it!

I'm sure your Sharon knows you'll never forget her. 

Take care x

Thank you for your reply. I always find it helpful knowing there is someone out there who genuinely understands how I feel ! It’s comforting in some way & feels like you are not alone. I am very fortunate in that our local hospice, who cared far Sharon, offer long term support & now I attend a bereavement cafe every couple of months. It is really helpful to meet people face to face all of whom have suffered a loss & understand each other.

best wishes,

Paul x

Hi there, when you say, “There is nothing in life I wouldn’t give to hold her in my arms once more,” is exactly how I feel about my darling Paul. It is so beautiful and poignant. There is part of me that never wants my darlings memory to fade, but the other part has to gently let him, so that I can function and survive. Xxx

It is comforting in a strange kind of way isn't? Especially after some time people expect you to be over it. Little do they know we'll never be over it and that we wake each day with the shock all over again of realising they're not here and having to get through another day without them.

I've struggled to find a group,  my nearest is at the hospital, I can't face going to a hospital! The hospice counsellor dropped me like hot cakes without any case closure, that was disappointing as I found her helpful. I've been looking at a website called at a loss and contemplated joining their online group but I keep holding back. I do think it may be helpful to have such a group to attend. 

Today I've been asked a couple of times what I'm doing for Xmas when I just want to scream leave me alone! They look at you like you've grown another head when you say 'nothing' and offer no explanation. I'm not explaining anything. 

I'm glad you have some support from the group x