I’m heartbroken

Charlie, I wish I could be there with you. xx

Me too, another night on the couch, another morning waking up early although I think I have slept a tiny bit longer this morning. Could this be a good morning. Every time I say that, something else comes in the post to upset me. Xx take care

I’m choking back tears reading this. It all sounds so familiar. Fantastic that you’re doing the art therapy group. I’m tidying our basement studio. It’s a dear friend’s birthday and I’m teaching her how to etch, as a present... and it means I have to concentrate and sort things out... Sending a hug x

I to wanted to run out of the house and not go back, as i am sure many of others have wanted to do. The advice i would give though is do not rush into anything you might regret further down the line.i knew someone who rushed to sell her house after her husband passed away and always regretted it. Give yourself time to think to make sure you are not doing the wrong thing. I lost my husband 15 months ago and still do not know what i want to do. Take care.

Thank you for the advice, my mind tends to run away with me, in all honesty it would take me over a year to clear his garage, he spent a lot of time making things and has every tool and gadget under the sun. I don’t even know what half of them are called. He has been clearing that garage out for about 10 years and I couldn’t even find a screwdriver in it. Fond memories in it though. Xx I met one of my neighbours today and the first thing she asked me would I stay here, they know I don’t come from here but I will take my time and if I do I will try and get the right property in the future. Xx

I am glad to hear you are taking your time to stop and think. A suggestion for when you are ready to give your husbands tools away, is a place called men's shed, which is where i gave my husbands tools to. I believe there are some all over the country, and they came and collected them. But only do this when the time is right for you, there is no rush, take everything at your own pace, Take care.x

Hi, that is a great idea, in fact my hubby was going to join the men’s shed. Thank you for suggesting that. Xx

Your very welcome. Hopefully it will help you knowing the tools will be appreciated, and used by people who will make good things with them. But as i said do it at your own pace. Take carex

Hi Dipsy!

That was me exactly just over 16 months ago. I wanted to sell this place knowing Jay my husband wasn't going to be here. Even in his last days he was looking at the logical side of things. He said to me why did I want to sell this house when I was mortgage free and the house is mine. If I moved I would need to rent somewhere because no way could I get another mortgage at my age and because I would have capital from selling this place I would probably need to pay full rent. It's not a mansion I live in just a two bed flat done our best to make it home on the budget we had over 30 odd years. At the time my head was just all over the place and like yourself dipsy, I don't think I knew what I wanted back then really. All I could think of at the time was that I just didn't want to be here. Now though I feel I have no option but to stay here financially it wouldn't be practical for me to move and at the end of the day I have a roof over my head if nothing else. I have my sister who lives not far from me in sheltered accomodation. She has learning and mental health issues and needs me for certain things. She's independent to an extent but there are things she can't manage to do on her own like things in authority banking, bills etc. 

There's lots I want to try to move forward with but still feel the incentive is not there just yet. It will come eventually I hope and can start steering ahead at some point. Some days I still feel very lost and don't know what way I am going. I wish you well moving forward. Take Care. 

Vicky xx

Charlie

Im thinking of you and sending you as much love and strength as I can to help you through the next couple of days.

No lie, it will be hard and horrible and surreal.

But I sincerely hope you get the laughter and lovely reminiscences as I did at my beautiful Valen’s Celebration of his life.

️