Not ready to move house just yet!

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Hi Dutsie,

I wish you good look with the changes you have planned in your house and I hope your home turns out just how you’ve planned it and you spend many happy years enjoying it.

Kind regards Ian x

Beautiful memories Jane.

In my case, initially I wanted to move because it was both mine and Maries dream to have a private garden and also the house that I live in is too big for me (as its a three storey town house) and I’m rattling around it. So I need to downsize but as I said; for now I’ve changed my mind and will stay put until I feel like I’m ready to move on.

Sending hugs, take care Ian x

Hi Pooka,

I would have done exactly the same as you under these circumstances and to move closer to your family. You made a brave decision and I do hope you settle down in your new property and new town.

It must have been so difficult for you to make this decision so soon after your husbands passing but I really do think the move will pay dividends (metaphorically speaking) in years to come.

I do hope we all find peace one day, kind regards Ian 

Thank you Ian 

I guess we all have to find a new sense of 'self' ...

Life will never be the same as before but we have to face the future, if only because our loved ones never got that chance. ♡ 

Mym

Hi Mym, 

I totally agree with your comments, life will never be the same but we do have to face the future out of love and respect for our partners that never got the chance to live theirs.

I do hope we all find peace one day, Ian x

Hi Ian,

I am so sorry you have had to become part of our group here. I know how difficult things are. You may very well still be in a fairly "numb" phase of grief. It is best to take your time with any decisions. I can totally understand how you are feeling. So many memories and, by leaving your home, you may feel that you will leave an important part of your happy memories. This is completely understandable and what has happened has shown you what your true feelings are. Listen to them. 

I moved just two years after my husband died. It really was necessary - I lived in a very remote area in NW Scotland and was far from family. It made sense. But one thing that helped over those first two years is I completely made over the living room (we set up his hospital bed I there and that is where he died - at home, just as he wanted). I made it over with my darling Chris in mind, creating a space he would love as much as I would. And when I moved, it meant that there was little to do with the actual interior design of my new apartment.

Where we are physically is very important, but what we surround ourselves with is, too. Just do what your heart tells you to do and give yourself time to find your way. I thought by leaving the home Chris and I shared, I would be leaving behind part of him. Chris may never have lived where I am now, but he is all around me in the photos, the trinkets, the furniture, the books.the artwork, and, most importantly, in my heart.

Martha

Hi Martha, 

What kind and thoughtful words.

No matter where we live our loved ones will always be with us. The buildings we live in may change but our loved ones will always remain with us forever within our hearts.

At some point I will need to move as the house I currently live in is too big for me and I’m rattling around in it, and I would like a house with a private garden and thats one thing I won’t compromise on.

But for now I’m staying put with my lovely memories and perhaps over the next year or two I’ll move closer to my daughter as I think we’d both benefit from being nearer each other.

I do hope you’re settled in your new home and your beloved Chris will always be with you.

And I hope we all find  peace one day, Ian x

Hi all,

I am actually not sure whether I have already replied in this thread or not. I just wanted to say that, personally, I cannot imagine moving house and I don't think I will move house in the future. my house holds so many memories of Paul and myself together, beautiful ones and also the difficult ones towards the end, and I feel his presence everywhere in the house and our presents together which was so beautiful. I couldn't leave it behind. because if I moved into a different house now, it would only hold my own energy and I want to Paul's energy around me.

lots of love, Mel

We are all different , but I totally agree with you that’s exactly how I feel x