Ashes into jewellery

Hi Lizzy-K and all 

I left my husbands ashes at the undertakers over the summer months to give myself a breather - I knew he wanted them buried at the church with his dad but I just couldn’t put our kids (or myself) through another goodbye so soon. When I did collect them I felt the pressing need to carry out his last wish so I know for me, it was right to have a break & not rush to do this. 
my daughter has a ring from Ashes into glass- if you look on their website it gives you an idea of what they do - we are in south east England but they take orders from everywhere, you can even go & see it being made of you want to. Her ring is engraved & it very well made, it’s not a showy ring, to those that don’t know she doesn’t have to explain it, it looks just like a well made ring. In case you were wondering, sounds a bit morbid but they only need about a teaspoon of ashes to pendants/rings/cuff links so it’s not a lot, but I’m so glad we did this as she gets so much comfort from it, her dad is with her wherever she goes. 
hope you have a good day everyone & can get out to  enjoy the sunshine 

 Sarah xx

Hi

My son has just had a bit of a birthday party in our garden and I was surprised when one of the girls said she was wearing a pendant with her grandads ashes ! 

She said she never takes it off. He takes care of her! 

Anyway no rush as everyone says! I never thought I would keep Ric so long but it is comforting to have him nearby. But then I know he would want to be free too xxx

I also have a pendant with a little of my wife's ashes it ne er comes off I bought it on line cheaper than crematorium it is a comfort to think part of her is still with me  ian 

I've got a ring with the ashes embedded with diamond dust and covered in a reddish pink resin. My stepdaughter has a pendant spelling MUM and also has ashes embedded. The funeral director, who is a friend of mine, had a special wooden box made, hand painted with our fav picture and words from her daughter and myself.

Hi Lizzy

My husband died 7 months ago & I never thought I would want any of his ashes made into jewellery until my kind funeral director showed me information on the company Ashes into Glass,I would highly recommend this company they are not cheap but the jewellery is high quality & not cheap looking in any way..Since then I have had a gold necklace with a small pendant size of about a 5p piece  made with some of Micky's ashes.I chose the colour blue to have the ashes impregnated into it as he had been in the navy & it reminds me of the sea & his uniform,I have it engraved with 'Always with me' on the back of it & I never take it off as it gives me comfort in a lot of ways.I have the rest of his ashes in the living room by his photo until such times I feel ready to scatter them at sea which was Micky's wish. Its a very individual personal choice Lizzy so do take your time over it all.

Best Wishes

Laura x 

I've had my husband's ashes in the house for the last three years since he died. I have no idea where to scatter them – there is no particular special place for us and the one place he might have wanted to be is not accessible any longer. There's no problem with having him at home but I have the feeling that the time will come for me to let him go. But where?

Having some jewellery made with his ashes seems so appropriate – he was a geologist, so to convert him into rocks somehow seems the only thing to do and I like the idea of him being something permanent, not scattered all over the place. I haven't investigated it yet because there's no hurry, but the next puzzle will be what to do with the ashes that don't get used.

I can see why some people would not find this idea palatable or acceptable, but it would be so right for me.

My friend's husband died a week after mine. His son lived in Australia so the funeral and scattering had to be done in a very short space of time. My friend felt it was all too rushed for her, so she asked the funeral director to keep some of the ashes back in a separate container. She then had a scattering event with friends who hadn't been able to go to the original one later in the summer, followed by a BBQ and lovely social event. 

Everyone grieves in a different way and I don't think there's an issue with people close to the person who has died taking different approaches to remembering their loved one.

Hi dramacat

I think it does sound that your husband's ashes should be made into something. It sounds so him! My friend's jewellery is tasteful. She used ashes into glass and my undertaker gave me the information too. It is not for me personally but I understand why people do it.

My personal ashes in a small pot with his special necklace to him and dog tags are in the garden. The rest are to be scattered. Strange thought I know but there are a lot of ashes!! I personally don't want bits of Ric all over the place, I want him whole and free. That was more him. His family did that with his parents and I have now got a bit of each of them to deal with. That is a little difficult, Ric was my second husband and I was not really close to them. I will just put them all together.

Take care everyone

Love and hugs Alison xxx

Hi everyone, I haven’t been on here for a while don’t know why I left it so long, because every time I read all your posts It makes me feel a little bit, as if I’m doing ok, hope this makes sense as I’ve been really struggling. I also have a necklace with my husband ashes in, it gives me so much comfort. Reading all your posts this morning has given me the push I needed to get myself out of bed and stop mooching around thank you all take care.

love Mandy xxx 

Well done Mandy!

I have pulled my butt out of bed, and thoughly cleaned downstairs, roast prepped and about to start cooking, washing on the line, sorted a box of Ric's belongings as I decided to bring back almost the last of his stuff from my dad's (stored there until I decided what to do with it) and next to start on my room. I have also cut the grass.

I am going to redecorate the hallway stairs and landing soon, as it is painted in Ric's choice of colours, not mine and then the living room by Christmas. I am trying to declutter a bit too.

I have been plain lazy in the last few weeks and unmotivated. I started well and now have relapsed. I am not tearful and will always be lonely and sad he has gone. I have an odd bad day but getting better. I can't live in the past and he wouldn't want me to.

I have offered to help carers of sufferers with PTSD on his regimental site today. I hope I can help or just be a listening ear. He would be proud of that. 

So another burst of energy is on its way!!! Lol.

Love and hugs Alison xxx

Hi Alison,

Well done you! and thank you for your reply it really made me smile. The strange thing I have been the same, unmotivated and lazy as if I had a relapse to. We only have a one bedroom flat, a nice little flat by the sea, so not a lot of decorating to do but it does need a fresh coat of paint.  I am just trying to arrange a plaque to put on the bench where my husband sat, I should say his name is Gordon. Also when all the family can meet up we are going to scatter his ashes  in the sea, that's what he wished for, so getting there slowly.

I think that's a brilliant idea to help with sufferers with PTSD our daughter always says I should do counselling work, perhaps it something I could pursue in the future.

Not sure if anyone saw the news about the beach that had a rave on it in South Wales but that's where I live! but its normally a quite beech.

take care Alison lots of love Mandy xxx