Hello all.
This is my first forum. My mom passed away 3 days ago from metastatic pancreatic cancer. She was diagnosed 2 weeks before her passing and prognosis was possibly 6 months. She was in hospital as she had a fall in her bathroom and diagnosis came from incidental finding. She never came home. 4 days before her passing, the consultant refused a care package for discharge home as felt she had more than 12 weeks and didn't see a decline (despite the fact she had gone from being active to bed bound). We had to appeal his decision and she was moved to a hospice Friday morning at 8am for palliative care and passed away 4 hours after arriving there. We have had no time as a family to process - she had not felt well 6 weeks previously but body scan was clear apart from some infection on her lungs - she was then diagnosed 6 weeks later with mets on lung, liver and kidneys and primary was found to be on the pancreas - we recieved this news on the 4th anniversary of losing dad after a 2 year battle with lung cancer.
We thought we were prepared - however their journeys were completely different and despite not suffering as long was a much less peaceful process with a lot more pain, terminal agitation and heartache for us.
We're taking every day one step at a time and this time there is a lot more to arrange and organise as there is the house to clear etc.
Hello Ldaniel
Welcome to the Online Community. I am sorry that you have had to find us in such sad circumstances.
I am very sorry to hear that your Mum passed away so quickly after her diagnosis of cancer. It sounds as if it was a very difficult time for you all and I hope that her short time spent in the hospice was of some comfort to you all.
I understand that receiving the news on the anniversary of losing Dad will have bought back memories and been difficult to cope with.
Taking things one step at a time is a good plan. I know that when my own mother died from cancer- I felt a huge range of emotions and it was a case of at times just accepting that this was normal in the circumstances. Keeping to a bit of a routine helped, talking to others and also sorting the practical things helped a bit.
I found Home - Cruse Bereavement Support really helpful. It takes time to start processing things and this is very natural.
I am pleased that you have felt able to reach out on here and I hope that it will help to share experiences with others on here. There are many lovely people on this forum who will want to offer support so please do continue to reach out when you need to.
We also have the Support Line available from 8am-8pm each day if you feel like talking things through would help.
Jane
