My mum

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Hi, I’m a long term visitor first time writer on the site. My beautiful funny mum passed away in May at only 56 after battled SCLC with brain mets. She fought so hard and was so brave and I will forever cherish and admire her strength. Her final days are all just a blur because so much happened in such a short period of time I don’t think I fully processed what was happening properly at the time. I’ll be doing a normal everyday task when another memory comes flooding back and I burst into tears at the sadness it brings me. I know my grief is still very new and raw but will these fits of tears ever go away? The slightest smell or song sets me off and I’m just overwhelmed and want to be left alone. I’ve recently returned to work after having months off to help care for mum and it feels day by day I’m slowly getting a little bit of my old self back. How long will I feel this sadness for? Does it really get easier over time or is that something that people just say to make you feel a little better

Former Member 5 months ago

Hi Hollyemsy welcome to the forum and I so very sorry to hear of your mums death.. There is no guidebook for grieving or how much time we grieve for, as we are all different and your loss is so very recent and your mum.so young. You cry for as long as you want to or need to and yes time will take away the rawness the feelings but not the sense of sadness or the sense of loss. You will get bits of you back but remember she will forever be a part of you . Sending some huge big hugs your way for now. Gail x

Tazraz 3 months ago

Hi there, firstly, I’m so sorry for your loss. Everything you have written here is exactly how I feel. My mum also passed away from SCLC and acquired pneumonia. She passed away on 6th June. It all happened really fast and I think I still feel a bit shocked. I know you wrote this 2 months ago, how are you getting on now?

MariaVal15ecf6 19 days ago

Hi. I am so sorry for your loss. I also lost my father from SCLC. I still can't believe how brutal this cancer is. It feels quite traumatic. I can assure you that time heals. Probably no one can erase memories especially the traumatic ones, but the pain feels less with time. I mean, there are dates that will remind you of things, there will be moments that you will feel unberable pain, but with time the pain will get better. I promise that. You can also ask for help- I did. There is also the Loss Foundation, they offer great support groups. I have attended a couple.

It's been almost two years for me, but still trying to accept the facts. I still try to find people with SCLC experience (carers), because it feels that this cancer is different from other cancers. So aggressive, so fast.

I am not sure my answer helped, but I hope you feel better, even a little, with time. And remember that you are not alone.

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