Mum - waves of grief

Hey Kezzie

Sorry about your mum passing :( 

First of have a good weep. Let it all out and acknowledge it. Which you may have done already. If you are really struggling and need to chat to someone I am here if you need.

If you have not done so the support line is amazing 0808 808 00 00  (8am-8pm) 

I tried to structure my day better to help me cope. Walks and some light exercise helped me.  

How are you getting on ?

Eddie

Hi Kezzie I would just feel all the emotions let it all out. I thought I would never stop crying. Today not even a year on I have managed to speak about her without crying although I did have a huge pang of sadness. Sending hugs your way 

I'm OK. I tend to go up and down and most of the time. I let it out if I'm on my own or with family.

I had to see three people through work today who all knew as their appointments had been postponed to today because of Mums funeral. One I was completely fine with,  another tears were there but I got through it and the final one gave me flowers and we talked about Mum and her Mum and it was actually comforting. 

It's a roller coaster of emotion.

Tonight I'm not great again. This time though, I'm worried about Dad.

I ring him daily and I'm going to see him for three days next weekend as I live 90 miles away. He isn't feeling 100 percent and I don't think he's eating properly.  I guess it's hard to find the motivation to cook for one.

My brothers going to go to see him tomorrow as he can get to him by bus, as lives 10 miles away. I'm hoping he can make sure he's OK. Plus the district nurse is calling tomorrow for a routine procedure he has done.

But I 'm still really worried. I've let him know he can live with us if he wants, but he wants to try on his own. Not easy in your 80s after nearly 60 years married.

Just realised overnight, even when I'm not on a wave, life's joy seems to.have gone. I'm lying here now listening to the birds chirping and the seem slightly annoying,  rather than a lovely welcome to the day.

And I can't be bothered to get up. I will, as I have work, but I used to love going to work as its a real challenge every day. I'll probably be OK when I get there but I've lost some of my get up and go.