Wedding a month after moms funeral

Wonderful! I think you've done exactly the right thing and I wish you a long and happy married life.

Hi, 

I was due to get married on Thursday (3rd time lucky due to covid) however the beginning of august we had the awful news my mums cancer had taken over and it was going to be weeks/months, everything was going through my mind and I decided to Postpone our wedding, she actually died only days later on 21st august 2 days being sent home. My mum got diagnosed in 2018 and after surgery and chemo she had been well. She had been on immunotherapy for 18 months and had been living a normal life until it had spread to her bones in February this year. I feel so angry and upset if it wasn’t for covid we would of had our wedding last year and she would of been there, but I know that’s nothing I can change.I didn’t tell my mum I had postponed because I know she would of told me to go ahead with it but I just couldn’t, plus she wasn’t very with it when she got home.

Your mum would of been so proud you went ahead with your wedding! My mum actually came dress shopping with me back in 2019 and even food tasting so it comforts me she knows how it was going to look.

How were you on your wedding day without her? We have postponed ours to May now and I’m worried how I will feel on the days.

sophie x

Summer days - I’m so sorry to hear about your mom, sending hugs to you, x i don’t really know how to explain the last few months but will try and explain how I felt on my wedding day - , it’s been a whirlwind of emotions the last few months, on my wedding day I wasn’t sure how I would feel either, 2 weeks after moms funeral I had so much to plan - this was our third wedding date, like yourselves had we not had Covid we would have got married last year, our 2nd wedding date ironically was 2 days after mom passed away, the hotel didn’t do small weddings so as we were still in lockdown we changed to the third date but news didn’t look like we would come out of lockdown so I told mom not to worry about the wedding as it didn’t look like it could go ahead anyway ... I wanted her to feel at peace with everything and who knew if it would go ahead anyway !!! our 3 rd wedding date was 4 days after lockdown was lifted so all very last minute go ahead - my husband was retiring at 50 years old ( great age to retire !) from his job so that’s why we went ahead with the wedding otherwise like you I would have delayed it till next year, 2 weeks after moms funeral we had 2 weeks before the wedding and I had a meltdown, I just couldn’t do it, my sister and I met up and we sat by the river, cup of coffee in hand and just cried , we missed mom so much and the pain of looking after her was starting to show .... I’ve no idea how we pulled the wedding off my sister my husband and I just picked off the tasks n got in with it, I wasn’t feeling the excitement if I’m honest, I had no hen party as couldn’t deal with it n probably didn’t have time after The funeral anyway , I also had just seen most of the wedding guests ( we had 100) at the funeral and thought what’s this all about !!! But you know on the day of my wedding I felt ok, I knew mom was looking over me, I really did, when I was having my make up done the make up women Sam gave me a glass of champagne and said sit down let’s get your ready to a bride  - I absolutely loved her for That as it’s just what I needed at that moment, just to try n relax and enjoy the moment  ...... I can’t say it wasn’t hard not having her there, my dad had sadly died 9 years ago from a heart attack suddenly so we never got married sooner - i made sure I stopped during the day just to take everything in, like stopping before I walked down the alise to remember mom and dad and this is one of the best memories of the day..... I don’t know how you’ll feel but your mom would want you to be happy, she will be there on the day and you’ll have little signs of this during the day, I would also say for you to enjoy planning over the next months, you will have an amazing day and you will cope more than you think as the excitement of the day will carry you through ..... my sister planned a  Day in the garden the day after the wedding and this helped as we talked about mom then and we could hug and laugh about happy time’s with mom then .... im so sorry your having to go through this , you will have an amazing wedding and your mom will be looking over you on the day, keep strong, I had an amazing day and even though it was so soon after the funeral and I thought I wouldn’t cope, I did, the wedding day is crazy busy, it flies by and I have told mom all about it after !!! Sending hugs, sorry to ramble here if you ever need to chat or ask questions xxxx