Originally published 2/5/13
I was going to say "its funny, you know" but on second thoughts its not funny. I find I have good days and bad days, days when i feel positive and days when I don't.
Today has been more of the latter for some reason. I have felt tired, worn down, my shoulders and neck ache and I spent most of the morning half asleep in bed. This is not like me normally, but today something just…
Originally published 1/5/13
Sometimes it is hard to find things to write, hard to actually process my feelings and get them onto paper. Well, not paper, pixels perhaps – but you know what I mean. Today I am somewhat conflicted, I still don’t thing that I have actually accepted and understood what it means to have this cancer thing going on. It’s almost like it is happening to someone else, the shock of the…
Originally published 30/4/13
I've had a relatively quiet day today, I'm still digesting the information about the next stage of treatment - the length and severity of it. I find I feel rather like I would rather not have it done, that I have already done my part, that too much is being asked. Of course I am going to do it, regardless, I simply cannot escape it or avoid it. Never in my life have I failed to face down…
Originally published 29/4/13
Today has been a day of good and bad. Histology was in for my checkup with my consultant.
Good
I am, on paper at least, cancer free. The surgery worked, none of the tumour was left behind in my tongue and they had some margin of healthy tissue all round. Of eighty lymph nodes removed from my neck, only four showed signs of cancer.
It has been caught in time.
Bad
The margins on part of the dissection…
Originally published 28/4/13
Today has been a nice quiet day, the sort of Sunday that seems to last for ever. Trouble is, it's not quiet for everyone. My poor missus has been busy, more so because I can't do as much as before.
It makes me feel damned useless, simply because my instincts are telling me that it should be me looking after her. Its not though, the damned cancer has made sure of that. I hate it for…
