My mum passed away on the 2nd October at around 7pm.
It was an awful day. I got up and went to work as usual whilst dad was still at the hospital. He texted me in the morning to tell me that she was up in bed and talking. Which she was doing when I left her the day/night/I have no idea anymore before. She was making jokes and being sarcastic as usual.
I went to work and got on with my day and felt good enough to
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I shouldn't have made that last blog post. I basically jinxed everything.
That night (about 10pmish) my sister texted me to say that dad had rang an ambulance for mum because she was in agony and couldn't move. Dad picked me up on the way to the hospital and we were basically following the ambulance there.
We were put in a little waiting room and it was a good hour before we could see her and they were doing…
So I finally got a keyboard for my tablet. I've been finding it impossible to type on the one on screen. In the past I've only been able to update my blog at work which is a little risky considering how public that can be at times and now we're far too busy for me to be able to do it there.
I also miss being able to keep upto date with my friends on here, who I care and think about on a daily basis.
My mum…
I don't feel right today.
I feel down and angry and upset. I'm finding it really hard to communicate with people today. I'm finding it near impossible to be nice and friendly and I feel like such a bitch but I can't stop it.
My mum has yet another chat with the hospital today about her chemo trial. I sent her a message saying good luck. My sister said she's been eating alot better recently too though…
I think I need to see a counsellor.
The reason being is that since my mum's diagnosis, I have been having thoughts that I have been keeping to myself and I'm having trouble keeping a lid on them now.
I don't know who to speak to about how I feel because noone ever knows what to say in response and I feel bad for making them feel bad. I need to speak to someone who doesn't know me or my situation and can just…
