Just diagnosed

Hi James.

Just to say I hope you are in a better place this morning. You have come so far in having had the biopsy but for your own peace of mind would it not be better to know what your options are? Your doctor will be sent the results and is the person who knows you best to understand how it is affecting you so why not speak to them and ask if they can have a word with the consultant to ensure that your doctor can give you the results face to face rather than by post or phone? You are still relatively young and have many people concerned about your welfare who will figuratively hold your hand through this ordeal, but will also respect the decisions that only you can make. Please stick with us James and we will stick with you to get the elephant out of the way.

Thank you all. A post seems to have been deleted that I read via email. I am not sure why. It was referring to the time taken to get the Biopsy done. The first one was too soon after my Cystoscopy. My GP had to remind them to get a second one which failed because of Sats levels. The one I have just had was arranged a bit late because I refused to go to North Manchester General and they thought my Pre Op had been done. They eventually did it at Fairfield on a fantastic ward. The Consultant said I was trying to Micro Manage. I was because of my OCD.

Kind regards James.

Hello James.

I also received an email with a post to you from BarryW early in the morning which has disappeared. When I tried to post earlier I was having difficulty with the site so I think there was a glitch in the system. She was very supportive and summarised that your mass is very small and your PSA is low, so even if the biopsy shows that you have cancer you have a good chance that it is curative. Your doctor sounds brilliant and has earned your trust which is great. As BarryW said 'take a deep breath'. Prostate cancer ( if you actually have cancer), is normally slow growing but does need to be assessed so that a plan can be put in place either to just monitor you or to treat you if that is what you decide.

It may be a little while before you get the results from your biopsy which is not helpful so in the meantime keep to your normal daily routine.

Look after yourself.

Hi yes I did send that in the early hours, I decided to take it off because i have a very direct manor when I'm saying things and was concerned that it could cause anxiety unintentionally. Basically what I wanted to say was that it's a good idea to push forwards and get the results of the biopsy asap and the treatment plan in place as theres no point in stringing it out now. 

All the best 

L

Hi BW  I did read it and thought it was fair and to the point - not once did I consider it either "blunt" or "liable to increase any anxiety". To me it was honest and this is a forum where we share our thoughts and help and encourage others.

Since I have had my "Champs" hat on I have re-read many of my posts and amended them and have also apologised to someone when I thought I was being harsh - we all want the best for one another. I have had to take down a couple of posts - not on this thread - but overall most posters and you included are very positive in their posts.

No need to worry - and I am sure James knows that we all wish him well and as he's got this far - well let's all see it through with him.

Best wishes "L"

Thanks everyone for you help - Brian 

Hi James,

As you can see I've replied to "Alwayshope' with why I took it off and I hope I didn't worry you in anyway as I know you suffer with anxiety and I didn't want to cause you any distress by my upfront manor.  I am an advocate of getting on with things and a person that pushes through with problems fast to get a result. So I do find it difficult to understand why someone would switch off all phones when potentially there was someone phoning me with an answer to my problem. We do not all behave the same, I get that and I need to be more mindful of other peoples choices.

I'm not medical but I do believe (if you have cancer in your prostate) it is very treatable with a cure result because your PSA is 4.88 which is low for your age and the tumour? is 1 cm and contained. I see no reason to put obstacles in the way of finding out the result of your biopsy and getting on with your treatment plan. Time is not your friend here, you need to take a deep breath and be brave and move forwards. You are nearly at the end of this process and you need to get treated and then put this whole stressful time behind you. 

So forgive me if I am too direct, this is my way and the way I cope with things and I wouldn't want to trigger your anxiety in anyway. (hence taking off the post) This forum and its people are very supportive of you and your mental health, you have many people reading these posts and wanting the best for you even if they are not answering.

So the end is in sight now. Get the results and let us know what they are and how you are feeling about the next step, theres always going to help and understanding here.

Best wishes to you 

L

Thank you, Sometimes in the wee hours you can worry more, and that's what I did. I would hate to be someone that could upset anyone else by my actions and sometimes when dealing with anxiety and the worries of other people,  it is just easier not to say what you think.

I do believe and always have believed James is in a good place to get to the end of this process, get a cure and completely move on from this problem, that will be a distant and slightly uncomfortable memory. If I'm completely honest the speed of these past events have frustrated me, because it's a different way of doing things from my way and I am trying to get my head around it and the perspective of thought. 

So, I'm looking forward to seeing what the next step is.

L

BarryW. I thought your post was very positive and I am pleased that people are prepared to say it as they see it. I am a bit of a coward when it comes to receiving bad news and need to get my head in a good space to get news. I am not in a good space at the moment. and may not be for a day or two. Thank you all for your help and encouragement. I do appreciated it. I just get scared when I hear the word Cancer and surgeons are not always the most considerate members of the NHS to those with Mental Health problems.

Kind regards James.

Don't beat yourself up "L". I can come across quite strong at times and have to think twice before I put down what I am thinking. I personally like your style and have gained a lot of information from you. It is very difficult for anyone who does not live with, or has a partner who has to deal with some form of mental illness to fully understand the daily battle involved. Yes at times I have to be strong with my husband to stop him internalising everything and even to get him out of the door on bad days. His behaviour means that at times I apologise for his actions as extreme stress can make him react irrationally - I then have to be blunt with him to bring him back to earth. James is obviously an interesting and intelligent man who understands his illness and I am sure knows that it is difficult for others to comprehend the full effects of it. I think that his posts help to give an insight into mental health battles even if we can't personally understand them but that does not mean that we shouldn't say that we don't understand.

I am one who perhaps has a better understanding of mental health than most people as we have had issues in the past with family members and Mrs Millibob is a dule qualified nurse and is both a General Nurse and a Mental Nurse having worked in various units in our area.

I personally think we all have issues - from minor ones to major ones - but most people know how to control them - in the same way that most people are somewhere on the spectrum for autistic behaviour - again most people can control this but we all have our little personal habits - you should see our cupboard with all the cans in order, the right way round, labels showing and in date order!!

I think James is doing great and with that final push - WE will get there - thank you all for your input and help.

Best wishes - Brian.