4weeks after husband’s diagnosis

My husband of 47 has been diagnosed with incurable inoperable advanced prostate cancer the consultant was able to tell us that it spread to bones before he had a scan however a scan was done and it showed it had spread to left leg right hip pelvis sacrum and coccyx the next scan showed it had also spread to lymph nodes and and other surrounding tissues surgery was not an option biopsy have been taken and we where told depending on results chemotherapy could be considered the consultant also told us this would cause my husband’s demise (his words) and it is terminal my husbands only symptoms where an ache in his back and dry ejaculation to say I am terrified is and understand I myself am year out of treatment for breast and node cancer and our son is currently in remission from acute lymphoblastic leukaemia 3 I one family utterly heartbroken 

  • Awful news.

    Did the consultant mention hormone therapy?

    - - -


    If I can't beat this, I'm going for the draw.

    Meanwhile, my priority is to live while I have the option.

  • Hi

    You have been through the ringer, the whole family has got something going on, such sadness, his symptoms are like mine, it took a move to anther town where check ups are required to join the doctors, that’s when I was found, extremely irritating.

    I under went first hormone tablets reduce my PSA, then chemotherapy then radiotherapy, this was five and a half years ago, he’s probably stronger than me at 47 so should be ok with this treatment. But things have moved on and there’s new treatments out there, so all is not bad news, people nowadays have lived up to ten years and further so hope he’s in that category.

    I know this is very stressful, you’ve been through it, so you know being positive is a must, I’m sure his team will have everything planned out and he like you were, be in good hands.

    Stay safe


  • It’s just 5 weeks since we were given my husbands stage 4 advanced metastatic prostate cancer diagnosis which has spread to various bones and also his lungs. I was devastated the same as you but I am not dealing with cancer myself and I don’t have a child with leukaemia!  My heart breaks for you it really does.. I am so glad you are here with this group where I have received enormous insight and support. 
    The good news is that with hormone therapy in the form of a 3 monthly depot injection testosterone blocker Prostap3  my husbands PSA has come down from 44.4 to 2.2 in a matter of weeks. So although we are not able to cure the cancer we are looking for the tumours to go into hibernation. We don’t know how long this will last but we are hoping for years like a good few of the other men in the group. I read a lot of the posts to hubby and it has given him enormous encouragement and hope. 
    keep talking to the group and ask any questions you like .. there will be someone here able to help you. Sending you the warmest hug x

  • I am so sorry to hear this maria, your family has certainly been through a hell of a lot. I wish you and your husband all the best and hopefully he can be started on hormone therapy asap x



    "Diagnosed March 2021 at 38 years old with stage 4 metastatic prostate cancer, my journey so far is on my profile"

  • Hi pail thanks for your message hormone therapy started the next day and has took discomfort away we see consultant oncologist on the 7 th to see if Chemo could be an option as they will have biopsy results by then but they have already to told us this will be to prolong life to quality and quantity will play apart I. His decision I read your blog it gives me hope as all I feel at the moment is fear 

  • Than you so much for reply I am finding out more and whilst I am terrified I have been given some hope from other men’s journeys x

  • I know it's a terrible time but there are alot more treatments available now for us stage 4 incurables which manage the cancer and give us more time with our family.. hopefully the hormone treatment is working then the chemo will add to that to help your husband. my wife and I were the same, Wondering, fearing the worst and we found macmillan nurses and councillors fantastic and really helped us. I still talk to the councillor now and it really helps, it's only over the phone but maybe that's something that may help you while you wait for the biopsy results. Take care 



    "Diagnosed March 2021 at 38 years old with stage 4 metastatic prostate cancer, my journey so far is on my profile"

  • Tomorrow we see oncologist to decide whether chemo will be an option to prolong his life never been so terrified of the answer x

  • They are usually very reassuring.. good luck.. x

  • I hope today's meeting went well Maria,(as well as it could go that is) I'll be thinking and praying for you both



    "Diagnosed March 2021 at 38 years old with stage 4 metastatic prostate cancer, my journey so far is on my profile"