Advice

Hello chezz .

A warm welcome to the group which is for anyone whose life is impacted by a diagnosis of prostate cancer. Your feelings are perfectly normal and from the time you have posted (if you live in the UK) I can see that it is keeping you up at night. The best thing you can do for you dad is to show him that you love him plus continue with your studies and get a good degree. To put your mind at rest, statistically 98% of men die with prostate cancer not of it and you are not going to lose your dad to it any time soon. Also if it is caught early it is very treatable and can be cured.

There are many different things involved before a full diagnosis can be made so your dad will have had, or is having tests done which will guide the doctors to give a treatment plan tailored especially for him. I have attached a link which explains what the tests are so that if your dad wants to talk about it you will understand what is happening. Many men initially prefer to bottle things up so don't push him until he is ready to open up, he has a lot to process and will do it in his own way. Conversely don't be afraid to ask questions or express your fears here as we can hopefully help you understand what is going on so that you can ask your dad intelligent questions.

https://prostatecanceruk.org/prostate-information-and-support/prostate-tests

Please don't use Dr Google. The link I have given you is a good reliable source of information, as are links on the Macmillan or Cancer Research UK websites.

At the moment I am not sure what the '4' signifies but I suspect it may be his PSA which is a blood test men over a certain age are advised to have done. If it is the PSA then it is low but needs investigating. I have also attached a link to give you a better idea of what different numbers can mean when staging prostate cancer after the initial tests are done.

https://prostatecanceruk.org/prostate-information-and-support/just-diagnosed/what-do-my-test-results-mean

Finally, treatment of prostate cancer has come on in leaps and bounds over recent years with anything from Active Surveillance (where the PSA is monitored regularly) to surgery (to remove the cancer), radiotherapy (to kill off the cancer cells over a period of time) and hormone therapy which weakens the cancer and can hold it at bay for a long time. Your dad will probably be given a choice of what he wants and if he needs any help deciding or wants support for himself then point him in the direction of the forum. Don't forget that dad might be feeling all the same emotions that you are and be just as scared and confused.

Please come back with any questions, no matter how small or silly they might seem and we will try and help you through.

Hi Chezz,

I am so sorry about your dad diagnosis and I totally understand your worry and fear. I remembered when my husband diagnosed back in November 2023 how terrified and shocked we all been.

8 months passed by and we learnt so much. We know now that PC has so many treatments and it is not the end of the road. People live with PC for many years and new treatments are coming up every year. My husband is getting Hormone treatments with 2nd generation hormone that was not available on the NHS only a couple of years ago. 

Most people with PC live almost normal life. Some PC are curable and some are not curable but treatable and allow the person to get on with his life. 

From your post I can see how caring your are. Your dad is very lucky to have your support. 

Please keep in touch with this community. People here are knowledgeable and generous, sharing their own experiences. You can ask any question you want and someone here will reply.

Lots of love

Dafna from Brighton

Hello chezz 

Another welcome to our forum from me. I am sorry to read about your dad's diagnosis.

You have had two great replies to your post so I won't add anything to them but will pick up on this

chezz said:

I also would like to run a marathon for prostate cancer, so any recommendations would be greatly appreciated!

That's a great offer and you can find details of our events if you click on "fundraise" at the top of this page and here's the link to Prostate Cancer UK who also organise events.

https://prostatecanceruk.org/get-involved/find-a-fundraising-event

If I can do anything else your you and dad please don't hesitate to contact me.

Best wishes- Brian

Hi chezz , I can’t really add much to the great advice already given.  If it helps I can explain my own situation.  From the information you have provided, I imagine your dad has caught this really early on.  My own case was found much later and I was given 5 years to live.  That was 7 years ago and I hope to go on for many more having a decent quality of life.  
I imagine your dad is younger then me (I am 75), so will have age on his side and has a low grade fully curable cancer, he will be fine.  Give him support and be positive about his cure.  Best wishes, David

Hello chezz .

Just a quick follow up to let you know that you are not alone and was wondering how you are coping.