We were just informed yesterday my husband has a grade 3 prostate cancer.

Thank you for your guidance and support. I appreciate every word.

You need to wait for the biopsy results to be sure of a cancer diagnosis (unless I've missed something). I've had biopsies with PSA levels of 8 and 13 and on both occasions no cancer was found.

I'm a bit confused as to how your husband has received a diagnosis before having a biopsy,

Also remember that prostate cancer is quite different to many other forms of cancer. It generally progresses quite slowly and many more men die with it than of it. There are many treatment options to either cure or manage it so wait until you have all the information available and then get on a pathway that suits your circumstances and lifestyle.

All the best

Rob

i'm another who can't see how they can give you a t3 diagnosis without having all the facts !! 

i was told nothing until i'd had a biopsy  ct scan and bone scan and then only after the mdt meeting 

i'm 5 years into incurable diagnosis so only palliative treatment !! 

what he needs is being surrounded by positivity and positive people 

atm i wouldn't worry about it until you have all the facts then see what ur facing 

what worked for me being treated as if there was nothing wrong , i carried on as normal work etc 

be positive i'm sure he will be curable 

Hi W

a psa of 8.7 on it's own means very little really, a biopsy is needed  to confirm cancer but a MRi scan could give an indication, I presume that he hasn't had a Mri? I would have thought , usually it is, a MRI next and then a biopsy depending what the MRi says.

regards

Steve

Hello Wifesince44 years, did your husbands T3 diagnosis come from the hospital or GP.

Eddie

I wonder if we are getting confused between PIRADS 3 from an MRI and a stage 3 cancer diagnosis. Obviously the former is not a cancer diagnosis just an indication of the likely hood of cancer being present.

I guess we will have to wait until Wifesince44 years can get more information from her partner.

Rob

Hi, I've just joined this forum (as a wife) - we're a little further down the road.  I know that time before your husband  has had his biopsy etc results is absolutely awful (and for me, so far, the worst time), telling our grown-up children (in their 30s) was very difficult (we put it off a few weeks as one of them was getting married during the awful waiting time) - but we found that they have coped ok with it.  My husband ( a very quiet, private man) told each of them in person, (he kept it brief and waited until he'd had the results, been given treatment options, and decided what he was going to do) then I followed up and made time to see them (on my own) a couple of days later to answer all the inevitable questions they had.  My experience was that in that situation my "protective mother hen" side kicked in. 

My husband recently went for the operation - complete removal, as his was medium grade which showed signs of being right at the edge (in danger of breaking out, I think). 

My experience was that we felt so much stronger once we knew all the facts (from the biopsy results and the PET scan he then had to have because of what showed on the biopsy) and husband had decided what treatment route to go down.

That time of going through tests, waiting for the next set of results, the next appointment - these were the absolute worst times for us (40+ years together) - and once we had all the results, facts and options it honestly felt better, and that we could stay strong together through this. 

Please, I hope this helps.  Also I found (in the hospital where he had the op) helpful booklets produced by Prostate Cancer UK (brilliant support) - there is a specific one for partners of men going through it and how to support.  I'm sure they're available as downloads too.

Wishing you both well.

Hello GC Gloria  A warm welcome to the forum and thank you for your helpful and informative post. A link to the Prostate Cancer UK publication you mentioned is below:

https://shop.prostatecanceruk.org/our-publications/all-publications/a-guide-for-partners-and-family

Thanks for your help and I wish you and your husband well.

Best wishes - Brian.

I also forgot to say - yes - that's exactly how I felt - some of the the music was heartbreaking. Also I found myself having all sorts of memories of our time together popping up in my mind during the day - almost like a film playing out of diffferent key points of our lives together showing up.  It was intense and very emotional.  I think this stage is probably (as others have said) a kind of grief.  You will get through this and I'm pretty hopeful that you won't always feel like this.  A great bit of advice I was given was to "look after yourself too".  

Ive got to say I didn't tell anyone until I had had all tests/scans and results and treatment options - otherwise uyou could be updating people every week or more often or even more often or being bombarded with their well meaning guidance from their internet research when you really don't know very much at all.