CHRISTMAS 2023 / NEW YEAR 2024

Carshalton 51.

I am so sorry to hear your news. I don't know if you have posted on this forum before but if you haven't then I wish you a warm welcome.

It must be a shock to suddenly find yourself back fighting your cancer. What I would like to say is that my husband was diagnosed in July 2020 with an aggressive form of PCa which has spread to lymph nodes and with distant metastasis. Our initial thoughts were 'this is it, he won't make Christmas' and in fact the doctors weren't sure that he would. Here we are 41 months later and still going strong. Since your initial diagnosis there have been tremendous strides in treating prostate cancer which break out again after initial treatment with a whole battery of new drugs as well as chemotherapy which wasn't as bad as we had feared. You have something to fight for, your grandchildren. If you need to talk to someone then Macmillan's will offer an ear or if you want to vent on here then there are many listening ears. Many of us are going through this rollercoaster of finding that the PSA starts rising after initial treatment, then getting it under control again. Please don't give up. You are amongst friends who understand what you are going through and will try and help you through if you will let us.

Please come back with any questions and let us know what happens on the 27th.

Thank you

Hello Carshalton51 . A warm welcome to the Prostate Cancer forum.

I am so sorry to see you here and having just read your posts and can fully understand your feelings - but all isn't lost. Christmas isn't the best time to receive bad news but - it's not the end - first of all I would be enjoying the grandchildren, give them a Christmas to remember and forget 27 December 2023 for the time being, it won't be your last anyway if we can help it!

Secondly - for your anxiety and depression - there's help - the first port of call - our help line - it's a free call and it's on 0808 808 00 00 (8am to 8pm 7 days a week) - give them a ring in the morning. There are a set of fully trained people there who can help with your feelings - trust me on this one.

Thirdly - You have us - it's OUR Community and you are a fully paid up member. We have Community members here who have had a spread into the bones and lymph nodes who are into double figures in years since diagnosis - there are some cracking new treatments about. The latest is "Triplet Therapy - and it works.

For me - please - step back - make that telephone call tomorrow - get Christmas back on for the sake of your family and once you meet the Oncologist on 27 December 2023 WE will get through this together.

Trust us pal - we've been there got the T-Shirt - is it a deal?

Best wishes - Brian.

Carshalton51, I am so sorry to read your post.

There are 2 outcomes here.

1. That this is your last Christmas.  From what you have told us, I personally don’t think it is likely.  I was diagnosed nearly 7 years ago with PSA 74 and incurable PCa.  However, if it is to be your last Christmas, use it well.  Enjoy the moments you get and don’t waste the time you have.

2. That you have many more Christmas’s.  (This is the likely option).  

None of us know how long we are going to have with this horrible disease.  You have had a massive shock and one common point that keeps coming out in the posts is that the start of the journey is the hardest time.  You probably won’t believe me but things will get better.  Ok it is a roller coaster but there are brighter times ahead.  Please take Brian’s advice if you need and come back to us with any concerns.

We are all with you.  Good luck.

David

Well said David. 

And All the Best Carshalton51.

Hello and welcome. I am sorry that you are feeling down. Like Brian says try and get your Xmas back on track and see the family. I woke up really sad today as we should have been travelling down to Southampton today for a cruise tomorrow but we had to cancel. I have told myself off as I know we have a great year planned for next year. Take care and just remember we are all here for you 

Hi Carshalton51,

We are new to all this. My husband diagnosed exactly a month ago with the same features as yours: bones and lymph nodes. The first 3 days i felt that the sky just came down. My husband the rock of the family, swim everymorning, bake, cock and look after me and our gorgeous 3 grandchildren. I was physically shaking and I am a strong person, I had a brain surgery 10 years ago.

And then I met this community here and I started to understand that it is not a death sentence. It is not! The hormone treatments work a treat and his PSA went down by 60% in two weeks. He is started another HT in January which is new to the NHS and was not there 8 years ago when you first diagnosed. And there are so many new treatments under developments at the moment. So if the oncologist say it is not curable but it is treatable, smile and keep going. We saw the oncologist on Thursday and we knew what is coming. So the first thing my husband did was arm wrestling with him to show him his strength. Listen to Alwayshope she is amazing and she know her staff. So the rest of the community. Please rearrange your Christmas and keep strong and active.

Best wishes

Lots of love from Brighton

Dafna

Thank you Dafna for the vote of confidence but can I stress that I am not an expert and up until my husband's diagnosis 41 months ago I, like most people, knew nothing about prostate cancer. My husband calls me a Rottweiler when I need to understand something and that is my way of dealing with what we were faced with. My scientific training in research and development taught me to analyse a problem, gather as much information as possible, question and then decide on the best solution. The doctors are the experts, we in this community are becoming informed amateurs who hope they can give back in order to help others. You are becoming informed since your husband's recent diagnosis and am sure you will say it is very empowering, so that you can take control of the cancer. I am so pleased that you are also giving back to others in a valuable way.

Yet another sunny day in Greece - sorry about that.

Hi Alwayshope,

I Just love your attitude which is inspiring so don't worry I know you are not an expert but you are absolutely correct to say that knowledge is empowering.

Yes, no sun here in Brighton. We cannot even go for a walk as it awful weather.

Lots of love

Dafna

Good afternoon Carshalton51.

I hope you are in a better place today or have sought the help which is out there for you. From the responses you have had already I hope you realise that you are not alone and that there are people waiting to give you a leg up on this journey. We would really like to hear from you just to know that you are OK. You are not forgotten.