The Shift of Perspective...

Good morning, Chris, I think your very positive shift of perspective is fantastic and so very positive! I wish you every success in your ‘musical career’! Who knows, perhaps we will see you performing on tv before too long!

I totally agree with everything you say here and think what a wonderful positive change you have made.  Good Luck with everything you do.   I learned many years ago when my second son was a teenager to be able to stay in the"moment".  My second son had lots of problems which started when he was barely a teenager with sniffing glue and went on from there.  He has an obsessive nature so anything he does he will do to the absolute limit.  Obviously he got in trouble with the police and carried on from glue sniffing to other drugs as well as carrying on with drug taking to a lesser degree gambling became his main outlet which involved stealing from both his mother and myself and others - First noticed when my wife who had a very good job at the time, got a credit card bill in 1981  for £2000 - so he had used her card he also went through cheque books cutting out cheques with a razor blade and using them.  Gamblers Anonymous were great and a lot of their sayings and teachings - including "living in the moment" have stayed with me and I learnt then - because my son has not changed and is now 55,  that I can't worry or  plan the next minute let alone the next hour or day.  I had to continue to do my job (where I had other peoples lives in my hands) and keep my family together whilst said son was missing having absconded from Police custody - in Borstal at times and then in prison.  Thankfully things are calmer now but this is still part of his character and things still go off the rails now and again - just did so yesterday.

All the best

I am so sorry to read about these devastating problems with your son, Freefaller. 

As far as the  'change of perspective' and 'staying in the moment' - somebody once said the following to me:

The past has happened and cannot be unhappened.

The future is mere conjecture and might not happen

To think of the past or the future is therefore a waste of energy and risks you overlooking the one important thing - the here and now!

So true! And something I have to remind myself of all too frequently. I admit - I spend too much time mulling over the past and worrying about the future. Note to self - must do better!!!!

Chris and Freefaller - I have read and reread what you have both put into words. to share such issues with us - mere strangers - must be very hard to do and you both have my ultimate respect.

My sympathies go out to you both and I appreciate how hard it must be to come out on here and share your personal issues - however having said that a problem shared is a problem halved. You deserve so much respect and I hope for both of you your issues are resolved as soon as possible.

I hope by sharing your experiences with us that it helps with your emotions and that as a Community and I am sure I write for us all we are here to help and are with you both on this journey.

Best wishes - Brian.

Thank you Brian.