Just diagnosed

Oh dear, I know exactly how you feel. I was diagnosed a few days ago. To have thoracic ct scan and have bn referred to MDT. Had right ovary removed for non cancerous reasons, however when sent to lab they found cancer cells. This is all I have been told - my Cons had rung me rather than wait for post op follow up. Like you, I am totally lost and I worry about my husband. I am a bit of a control freak and feel I have passed my life over to MDT and others. Dont know when I will hear, not sure who I hear from, afraid I get lost in the system.

You and I are new to this, we prob both feel in surreal situation and feel our futures have been lost. Then I look at others (I never, ever google) who have battled through and survived the experience. I then go from highs to deep deep depressive lows. You and I need to battle on. I am hoping that when a plan is in place, you and I can get our head in the right place. I suppose it's natural to feel how we do. I hope you stay strong, get a plan in place quickly and begin your journey. Fingers crossed all falls in to place very soon. 

Take care

Hi, I’m so sorry you find yourself here, the diagnosis is so overwhelming and scary. When I was diagnosed last January I was so shocked and couldn’t see a future. The  waiting for tests and results is so hard. I remember too all the positive stories, at the time I couldn’t see it. It’s been a tough year, chemo and surgery but one year on I’m doing really well. I’ve been on holiday and planning another. It took time to adjust and I found once I reached acceptance I was able to see a future living with cancer, I find trying to stay in the present helps, mindfulness helps to cope with overthinking. It’s easier said than done but searching on the internet can lead to reading data and information that’s out of date. I have learnt that there are so many new treatments for ovarian cancer that improve outcomes . I find Charities such as ovacome and target ovarian helpful. You will find strength you never knew you had. Be kind to yourself . X

Thank you Sem.24. My eyes were drawn to where you have said there are so many new treatments for ovarian cancer. These words are sooo powerful. Thank you

Thank you for responding. I am so sorry that you find yourself in a similar situation to myself. I just wrote a long fairly self pitying response but it seems to have disappeared into the ether !! Probably just as well. I hope you have a good weekend making the most of life. X

Hello gingerwinger.

I was diagnosed with grade 3 primary peritonial cancer and stage 3 epithelial serous carcinoma ovarian cancer. This was right in covid 2021. I also had a large umbilical tumor. My appendix was stuck to my stomach with tumor. My omentum was covered in tumors. At this point I was told there would only be palliative care for me and I was looking at approx 6 months. The consultant (I had to go privately because there was no chance of an appt in covid with NHS) told me to go home *eat cream cakes, buy the shoes and go to the opera* this gave me a perspective on my life and the words I needed to pull myself together and think of life and not the impending end of it.

I know exactly how you feel. I guess in away being diagnosed during the covid years meant all my appointments were on my own. My chemotherapy treatment was on my own. My surgery was on my own. In some weird way I was glad because it protected my husband and my family from seeing what I was going through. During my time in hospital we could only have video chats on the phone and of course I could be selective in what my family could see.

We are all different. We are at different stages. I'm so happy I've made it to the 3-year point. Of course the elephant is always in the room but we decided to take everyday as if we were just a normal family. You and your husband will find a way through this. 

Our next mountain is to appeal against wanting to stop my treatment in 2 months. I will never give up. 

I hope you can find the strengths you will need to get through this. Sending a hug

Hello Jay

You are at the most vulnerable stage right now. As you become better informed you will feel there is a path for you to follow. The waiting and uncertainty will play havock with your emotions. Good luck! I'm thinking of you.

Hello again Jay. I'm happy to say that I am a product of one of those new treatments. 

It doesn't work for everyone as you can see from previous posts. Believe me, things are always changing.

Your so totally right. I'm at the 3 year point and know just how lucky and fortunate I've been to have one of those new treatments. 

Acceptance and perspective is the way forward. Take care and keep positive.

I don’t know why I am writing this really except I wanted to open up to others who might understand I suppose. 
   I have woken this morning to pain and discomfort. I’ve done the usual… made myself a hot drink , taken painkillers and gone back to bed. But standing alone in my kitchen I have cried and cried and feel abandoned. This is totally unwarranted as medical appointments are coming thick and fast. MRI on Thursday then CT on Saturday ( I think to do a guided drain of ascites ?) . My husband and close friends are being wonderful. I still haven’t been able to speak to my two adult children … I just can’t. I shall cry and upset everyone, they need to enjoy their lives . 
    I keep thinking about the cancer growing inside me … it’s got large from nothing in even 6 months. What is it doing now ? 
     I’d sort of mentally got my head around it , I thought. Take one day at a time , live in the present , do what I can etc. But each morning I have this mental mountain to climb. I am 74 and have had a good life but I don’t want to leave it !! I feel terrible to think of my own self pity when others , younger than myself , perhaps with young children are suffering. 
   I was triggered into full scale sobbing yesterday by two things. One was my husband sitting at the dining table eating alone and knowing that this was his possible future. The second was seeing snowdrops flowering in the garden and thinking that I will not be here to see them next year. I felt such deep pain. 
    Well , having offloaded my misery on you all I shall attempt to pull myself together and read my book whilst drinking tea … until I hear my husband getting up and coming to see how I am. 
    I wish you all a hopeful day x

Oh I understand. It is a scary time when you thought you knew what life was going to be like and now you don’t. I think we have a lot grief for our old lives and I’ve had many tears for that because I can’t do what I used to love doing. The anxiety around waiting for answers and the shock that this is happening to your body would bring the strongest person to tears. We feel alone because as much as family and friends try to understand, they can’t unless they’ve also been through it. You aren’t alone - you have us and there are face to face support groups if that’s your thing. I wept on Christmas Day as I don’t know if I will be here for the next one.

Your suffering is just as valid as anyone else’s. I’m sending you a massive hug xx