Hello My dad has myeloma

Hello, my Dad has it too and I know exactly how you feel. My only advice here is to love on yourself. Take time to work on your feelings, journaling, walking and thinking, whatever helps you to balance out. This is often overlooked at times of great struggle and challenges, but it is so important, not only for us but for those we care for. Wishing you all the very best. Seeing our Dad's in this light is quite honestly, terrifying and soul destroying...but we  can do it xxx

Hello Debilou, I have MM, diagnosed after routine blood tests, so was a big shock at the time, everyone was down,  thinking oh! immediate death sentence,  but no, I was diagnosed several years ago, I've been through harsh chemotherapy and am still here typing to you. Oh, I'm 72, started this 'thing' about 10-11 years ago.

Obviously it affects different people different ways,  so I would advise you to get in touch with the local myeloma support group,  your nurses should be able to give you their details.  I did and spoke to members who have had mm for many years, so it's a long illness.

My problems are the ones caused by chemotherapy,  peripheral neuropathy,  gives me hell sometimes. I also suffer from fatigue, sometimes need to nap in the day...but, I stay positive for the people around me, that love and care for me.

Try to understand the illness and what it does. Understand what the treatment does, this way, you can understand how your dad feels and allows you to give him the support he needs and wants.

For my part, I need hugs, kisses, chats about anything,  I have pain, sometimes a lot, but managed with suitable medication.  

Look, talk to your dad, don't sweep it all under the carpet,  look him in the eye and just say " dad, whatever it is, I am right here for you"

I am sending you lots of love and good wishes, dont forget to tell him that you love him.

Xxxxxxx

It's really hard to see your Dad struggling. My Dad had tracheal cancer. He was a very talkative man, very talkative. So the day he had a trachiostomy, was bad day for him indeed. I went to see him in the hospital and had to fight visable shock to see him and then not having him tell me it's ok. I remember struggling to keep a bright positive conversation (I'm not very talkative!) Afterwards I remember sliding down the wall by the lifts sobbing my heart out.  It was an awful time. Like you say it's so hard to see them go through a very difficult time. It's hard for loved ones too. 

Thank you for your reply Mike,  im doing my research daily on what dad is going through so i have some kind of understanding as to what you all go through with myeloma. sending you lots of love and warm hugs xxx

Well done you, love and care are as good as any medicine.

good luck, God bless, pass on my best wishes to your dad xxx

Hi, I read your story, so sorry to hear about your dad, maybe he can't talk out loud, but he WILL talk to you in other ways.

You can still see him, hold him, hug him and tell him how much you love him, so don't be to broken hearted.

Just keep on finding ways to communicate without speech, enjoy each others company.

I am sure there are support groups that will help and advise you, your dad's nurses should be able to help with that.

Very best wishes to you and your dad.

Lots of love.

Mike