In a mess

Hi and another welcome to the online community

I can totally understand how shocked you are at the moment. I was diagnosed with melanoma nearly three years ago when neither my consultant or I were expecting the raised area on my arm to be cancerous. I think I just felt numb.

Most people find that once they know what the treatment plan is they feel a lot calmer and more in control. It's likely that it could be a while before your treatment starts as your doctors will want to find out what the primary cancer is. Each cancer, and for that matter each person, has their own tailor made treatment and so it's important that they know what cancer they will be treating.

If you haven't found it already you might like to read this information from Macmillan on secondary cancer in the lymph nodes.

Everyone has their own way of coping while waiting for results and you might find this information on coping with your emotions when you have cancer useful. You might also find these tips in Wellbeing Wednesdays help you to find ways to cope.

Do come back and let me know how you get on with your scans and tests. 

Sending a supportive ((hug))

Hi Tunstall Belle, I am sorry to hear that you are so scared at the moment. In 2015 I had scans that found many enlarged lymph nodes in my abdominal and pelvic areas, so they did a biopsy on the biggest near my spine through my back. I left hospital with no booklets like you they explained that until the biopsy results came through they would not know if it was the lymphoma that they suspected or not, that it could just be an infection. With me the primary wasn’t found and it is assumed that my immune system dealt with it it’s self, but the biopsy could tell that my cancer was metastatic melanoma and we could then move on to treatment for that. I am not trying to say that’s the cancer you might have I’m just saying I know how you feel being in limbo and trying to think of anything else, as I remember that period but I also felt very ill at that stage, so I’m thinking that it’s encouraging that it was a routine mammogram and that you weren’t having investigations because you felt ill. 

Have you had biopsy results back yet? 

have you long to wait for your CT scan?

Have you found the section on emotions? I wondered as I found that very useful reading about all the different emotions we have and ideas for coping. I’ll put the link in just in case https://www.macmillan.org.uk/information-and-support/coping/your-emotions

I find that the being in limbo is one of the worst bits, it’s always better to hear bad news followed by the good news of what they are going to do about it. Your attitude can then change to good I’m glad I went for the mammogram cos things can now move on to treatment, as each cancer type has its own treatment and they have to see what type they are dealing with and where it is. It must seem very scary at the moment if you try and race ahead, I try and thing one step at a time otherwise I would have written me off years ago, but it’s really hard to do that and definitely can’t be done all the time, but accepting that it’s normal to feel like you do for me made me feel a whole lot better. 

If you want to talk about how you feel or ask any questions of others or me just press reply. I can see you’ve had some good offers of help in the new to the community as well. 

Best wishes

Hi. Thank you you for your 'hug'.  I had a PET scan on 20th June and was told by the nurse it would take 4-5 days to get back to my oncologist, but just received an appointment for 7th August! I am concerned as the size of the lymph node is 18mm which seems really large and am worried that if it is left it will get even bigger and harder to treat. If I have to have surgery/chemo  again then so be it but it is just the hanging around which is the hardest part. My family keep saying that if results are not good I will get a call earlier (this happened when bowel cancer was diagnosed last year) but doesn't stop the worrying. 

It is really good to be able to speak to someone who 'has been there and done it'. Thank you for your support.

Hi , umm that appointment date does seem an unusually long time away. Do you have a keyworker allocated, a specialist cancer nurse who could check the date if you wanted them to. 

Hi. I don't have a specialist nurse but my oncologist has a really helpful secretary and I am going to call her tomorrow as my results should be back. Hopefully she can find out a bit more info for me.

Hi Tunstall Belle i can relate and understand exactly how you feel , in 4 weeks my whole life changed , 7 years ago i had a tumour in my right armpit removed and no other treatment , Feb this year i started with aching in the same area which turned to severe pain ,after numerous gp appointments i finally got sent for an ultrasound and they ended up taking biopsies , long story short the cancer had come back and i had a 7cm tumour taken out of the top lymph node and surrounding area and all the other nodes to this was 4 weeks ago , i still have a drain in and it's really getting me down and very little movement in my arm , i also had to give my Hairdressing salon up and close it after 16 years as you guessed it Hairdressers need there arms  to make things worse i have a rare cancer that nobody seems to have or has heard of and theres very little if no information at all out there , i take one day at a time and wake up and try to be extra smiley it's very hard when you have 6 million things on your mind but you must try , in my mind it's not the cancer or the operation that will make me ill although i will not beat around the bush and tell you it's pain free and plain sailing it isn't , what will make me ill is my mindset and although it is hard i have to be extra positive and smiley to keep me sane , don't get me wrong i have my moments and i suppose i will in future (once the drain is out and i'm healed more a course of radiotheraphy is down the line) but you must stay positive to help you through , i have an 18 year old Daughter i look at her and she makes me smile , i have a fab Husband who is more positive than i am and has a plan ! and i have 2 beautiful Chocolate Labradors that never fail to bring a smile to my face , focus on the good things that you have and the fab people you have in your life , always here if you need to rant , vent , giggle laugh or cry . stay positive