my husband has been diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. He’s had radio therapy now waiting for chemo. Understandably h we’re both up and down sometimes His mood swings are quite hard to deal with, I’m trying to be supportive and patient but struggling at times, any advice?
Don't try to be an angel,..your not, you're human...if he has mood swings, it's ok to put him in his place. Tell him he's being unreasonable, and you will not accept anything other than the respect you deserve. Do not feel it's your job to be his punching bag, it's not!..everybody has though times, he has to control himself as much as you do...Tell him straight, stand your ground, show him you're not going to be forced away so he can dive into the pit of despair. You both do this as equals and that's the rules.
Set rules, tell him what you will and will not accept. Nothing worse than ever changing goal posts, nobody ever knows what the boundaries are so they are easily overstepped.
the advice given by srewpot66 is spot on, I also have advanced lung cancer, I don’t use it as an excuse to mistreat other people, specially those around me trying to help and care. We all have good and bad days so I understand him being down, perhaps you could advice him to join this forum, it’s a good place to tell others in the same position how you feel and get some support
we are all on this forum because we need support we are a great bunch of people who understand each other very well even if we’ve never met each other, cancer is a hard journey but it’s not the death sentence it once was, treatment has come a long way. So whatever your husbands concerns are there will be someone here who understands, you are not his punch bag, we are also here for great people like you who care for us, so if you need support just get on this forum and ask.
Hi there , sounds like you’ve already had the best replies from stewpot66 and Hamhat . It’s so easy when you’re hurled into this cancer world to feel lost , hurt and downright angry but I agree with the others there needs to be boundaries and you need to deal with this as equals and with respect for each other … would he use a forum? Or speak to a councillor ( free 6 sessions avail if you speak with the helpline) …maybe a Maggies centre close by ? and remember all those support services are there for you too , so use them .Elly x
Feel like I’ve made it sound worse than it actually is, I don’t feel like a punchbag at all just sometimes difficult to know what to say or do. Actually we’ve always been close but this has brought us even closer together. Thanks for support
Aw I get that love , my hubby feels the same way , not knowing what to say or do sometimes , and he can’t “fix” it … you’ll work it out , get support when you can ….much love Elly x
