New here but have come to a complete block and meltdown.
I got diagnosed with lung cancer November 2018. I received three months radio and chemotherapy reducing the 8cm tumour by nearly 30%. I was fortunate to undergo a 12 month course of immunotherapy which ended February 2020 (straight into COVID lockdown) it took months to regain energy and function somewhat normally.
I started a phased return to work three months ago but a week last Friday I had a complete breakdown in front of my wife. It’s hard to talk about it physically and the doctor has put me on anti-depressants and 7 days of sleeping tablets. I just feel physically talking about it gets me too emotional to be able to deal with it but was suggested to join the community.
negative and positive thoughts are continually fighting themselves in my head at present I don’t know if any of you have had something similar to this ?
regards Dave
Hi Dave, welcome to the group, but sorry you find yourself here. It is good to hear that the treatment you have been on has reduced the tumour by 30% To have gone through all of that treatment, I am not surprised it left you feeling low in energy, your body has been battered by treatment. After I had radiotherapy, I found I was exhausted for months after the treatment had finished. I am now on hormone treatment, which brings it's own problems, including tiredness, brain fog, joint pain etc.
Going through any cancer diagnoses and treatment is extremely stressful. Lack of sleep will definitely not be helping, so I hope the sleeping tablets work. I have had a course of sleeping tablets myself in the past. The anti depressants may take a while to have an effect, but I hope they help you.
You said you have had a phased return to work. Do you feel ready in yourself to go back? Some people find it helpful to go back as it takes their mind off things. I went back to work myself, but I found that I wasn't up to speed as I was pre diagnoses, and as I was struggling with the many side effects of my hormone treatment, I decided to leave.
You have been through a very difficult time, and Covid and the lockdowns would certainly of added to the stress. I think probably your breakdown in front of your wife was a long tome coming. It is ok to not feel ok and sometimes it does you good to say, no actually I am not alright.
I am so glad you have joined us here. All of us here know what you are going through. I hope you feel that although you cannot talk about your feelings out loud, you will find it helpful to come here and type your thoughts.
Take care
