Today I found out I'm dying

Hi Firefly I am only 43 and in May 2019 I was diagnosed with breast cancer recurrence spread in to my lungs and liver and kidney.First they thought it was primary lung cancer then they changed their mind.I havent asked the prognosis and I dont want to know.

Anyway I am still here maybe to my dissapointment for my "caring" oncologist.I am having weekly chemo since August 2019 and still working now even my kidney and liver clear.

What treatment did they offer you?

I am now willing to "pack it" yet I.have even this week returned to work and Fridays I am having chemo.

I know its hard to stay positive and but dont give up hope.Although I know some people here dont like too optimistic people with incurable diagnosis.

Janet

Hi firefly

firstly, welcome to the site no one wants to join

I know you will be anxious about what is going on, but believe me when I say, you will feel better when given your treatment plan. Cancer can be a very scary diagnosis, but treatments have come a long way these past years, and people are outliving their original sell by dates, and living life, a bit different, maybe slower, but living and I’m sure you will feel better, when you know what treatment they are planning to give you. 

There are a lot of people on this site, all lovely, that will be able to offer you support and advice. If you just want to ventilate your thoughts, feelings, were here to listen, so please keep in touch. 

Take care and although it’s tough, keep going

Janet, I’m with you, optimism is the only way forward. I’m incurable, but not intending to go anywhere for a long, long time. So you carry on with your optimism, it is what a lot of us need- thank you

”Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning “(Albert Einstein)

Hi FireflyWitch

Welcome to us. I do like your choice of username.

I am sorry to read of your diagnosis and of course you will be feeling shock and anger right now, it is such a wrenching thing to hear and may take weeks to process.

When cancer patients find out their cancer has spread away from the primary, they usually describe themselves as 'incurable'. Partly because as your oncologist has already said, that with treatment we can live a long time as an 'incurable'. There are many of us about here. If you click on people's profiles, often they fill in a bit about them and their diagnosis sometimes giving a time line. Reading them helped when I first came here discovering just how long some have been knocking about the place.

Please stick to the proper cancer sites, as these are moderated and do not allow misguided information to be shared on them. Macmillan is good, so is cancer research etc, if you wanted to do further reading on things as you begin to process this information.

It is normal to feel angry and part of the process, my advice would be though, yes let it out but don't spend too long dwelling on the anger, it's a waste of time to feel angry about things that you cannot change.

Hopefully they will have offered you a treatment plan or will soon, then we find we focus on that and feel like we are doing something practical and this helps us along.

Keep talking here, there are many of us that have had a variety of treatments and can help give you our experiences or reassure you along the way.

Hi FireflyWitch,

In September of 2018 I had my first appointment with my oncologist. His opening sentence to me was 3/6 months without treatment but there is treatment and you’re getting it. I got my treatment plan, took my pension and retired from work at 57.Here I am June 2020, I’m well and I’m enjoying my retirement and have every intention of seeing my 60th birthday next February.

Yep, I’m sure you’re angry, it will subside, it will never go but the anger will give you the fight. There are a lot of us on here who are incurable and some have been been around for a long time. You are about to discover a strength you didn’t know you had.

I hope all goes well with your treatment 

Hi Firefly Witch

I am in a simliar position, diagnosed in March with Stage 4 lung Cancer which is inoperable. Oncologist said that without treatment I would be very frail and ill within a few months. I had two chemo cycles but they didnt work and my tumour has grown. Started immunotherapy this week so hoping this works. I am 51, not as young as you, but like you I feel angry. I stopped smoking 16 years ago. I had no symptoms until beginning of January but consultant thought it had been growing for about 6 months :-(

I hope your treatment is successful x

Hello fireflywitch

cute name!

i know how terrifying a cancer diagnosis is. I was told don’t google as it will only make you feel worse! Stick to McMillan and perhaps Roy Castle as they offer good supportive advice. Once you get your treatment plan and know what your options are you will feel better. Some days are good and some harder but then the support  of people here can help. 
Lung cancer has come a long way in treatment in recent years and there are ppl living a long time with originally poor prognosis. 

Hi fireflywitch 

Im going to change the heading of your post for you.

Today you found out you are living with cancer. 

Lots of us here in that group, you will find lots of support from us all, with plenty of encouraging stories to tell. I’ve been in the incurable bracket since 2014, and like others here I was told I only had 6 months without treatment. Keep hold of the positive comment from your consultant saying significantly longer with treatment. 

Just like to agree with everything that’s been said here.  I was diagnosed with grade 4 lung cancer in August last year a non smoker and 54 not as young as you but still felt cheated and angry and and so sad about everything.  But it does get better I have my moments but nowhere near the devastation I felt back then.  I’m feeling well I even manage to go on the treadmill in our garage doi 2mins jog and 1min walk for 45 mins.  So yes life is different but I’m definitely living with cancer and not dying from it and hope to remain so for a nice long time.  Take care and remember we are all here to listen to your worries that you may not want to share with your nearest and dearest xx

I was diagnosed with Stage 4 NSCLC on Feb 1st 2019, and started treatment at the end of March. I had been a smoker, but had stopped at 9:15pm Jan 8th 1988 - 31 years before diagnosis. My scan have shown cancer stable for over a year yet, I have just celebrated a birthday I initially thought I would never see, and my next target is NEXT year's birthday. Treatment is improving all the time. It's ok to be angry - use that to fight this