No hope?

Hi

Im new here. I was originally diagnosed with Ampullary cancer. Which Drs thought we had beat. I guess we did but 5 months into a 6 month chemo treatment, the cancer had spread to my liver and I have been told I have 18 months at most, even with treatment.

Its so hard to get my head round. Im only 49. My husband of nearly 30 years is devastated. My kids are doing their best not to show emotions. They still only in my 20s. And my Mum is beside herself.

How do I come to terms with dying? I have so much life I haven't lived yet. So much of my children's lives I will not get to share. And I cannot bear the idea of what my husband will go through.

I'd just started a new chemo regime, cisplatan and Gemcitabine, when my blood pressure dropped and my infection markers shot up. So I'm currently in hospitsl, probably the first of many stays.

This will put my chemo back, which feels like my life has been shortened already.

My family are holding out for a miracle. I'm fighting as hard as I can.

J

  • Hi  and a very warm welcome to the online community

    I'm very sorry to read about both your diagnosis and prognosis and can't begin to imagine how you feel. 

    I noticed that you hadn't had any replies to your post and hope you don't mind me suggesting that you join the living with incurable cancer group where you can discuss openly the sort of things that you're asking in this post with others in a similar position. If this is something that you'd like to do clicking on the link I've created will take you to that group.

    When you feel ready, it would be great if you could pop something about your diagnosis and treatment into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.

    x

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