Husband Diagnosed 2 weeks ago - Not sure how he is feeling as he is not communicating much and difficulty peeing and diet advice

Hi Sally2024 

Welcome to our community though sorry to hear about what you are going through it does sound very difficult and those early stages around diagnosis everybody finds really difficult. For me it is my wife with cancer and a very different one too.

My main focus on here is on our Family and friends forum and Carers only forum as one thing I know I had to learn the hard way was looking after myself if I was to be the most use to Janice.

I did find a page on Kidney Cancer UK on dietary advice, I hope it has something useful for you.

<<hugs>>

Steve

Hi Steve 

Much thanks as I am currently looking into POAs and Wills too and the travel insurance claim - so much to do ,..

xxx

Hello SallyMungal

I'm sorry to hear the news about your husband's diagnosis. I can understand how shocked you both must be, and I can understand your sense of urgency about 'putting everything in place'.

My advice is to slow down! You don't have to do everything all at once, you do have time to organise stuff like wills etc. If you are busily rushing round organising diet, research, appointments, legal things, it doesn't give your husband space to calmly talk with you. I can relate to how anxious you must be, as I responded in a similar way when I was first diagnosed. Lots of people do.

To reassure you, most (80%) kidney cancers are clear cell carcinomas. They are slow growing. The biopsy you are waiting for the results of will tell you if this is your husband's type. It is treatable, with immunotherapy, surgery or both. The majority of kidney cancers are treatable. There are several types of treatment available, and your husband's oncology team will know which to offer.

I know it is difficult, just waiting for things to happen, especially at this early stage of diagnosis. Try to find time just to relax and do your 'normal'  activities. Steve's suggestion to join the family and friends forum or the carer's forum is good....you can find support there from people who are in the same boat as you. You could also phone the support helpline for reassurance.

The most important thing for you and your husband at the moment is to have hope, and confidence in his team!

Leave the will-making and POA until later....it can wait!

I hope you will both feel better once he has a clear treatment plan going forwards.

Best wishes

Candysmum

Hi there thanks so much for taking the time to reply 

I didn’t mention he has been told he will need a right kidney nephrectomy in approx 4-6 wks time and that it is complex due to blood vessel Involvement.

i am a glass half full but also a planner and a doer ! 
gone into overdrive … good advice to slow down

thanks x

My renal vein was wrapped round by my tumour too....so my team decided not to offer surgery, but to treat me with immunotherapy initially. This did work, and my cancer is now dormant. I was diagnosed over 2 years ago, and I'm still doing OK!

Incidentally, you can read most people's stories on their profiles, by clicking on their name.

Try not to worry too much....

You do have a clear treatment plan, which is good. I hope all goes well for you both!

Take care

Candysmum