Returning to work

Hi Myth,

I had a my kidney removed in January too (stage 3 tumour) and share your feelings about returning to work. It is good that you are healing well physically but I think that the emotional healing can sometimes be even harder and take much longer.

I under estimated how I would feel emotionally returning to work. I am currently on phased return. I have a desk based job and would probably be even more anxious if it was a manual/physically demanding job. Work has been very supportive and that in part makes me feel even more guilty about my very reduced ability to work and be productive. 

What I am beginning to realise is that perhaps I am my own worst enemy sometimes. I can't speak for everyone but I feel like I need to be kinder to myself. Your idea of speaking to your boss sounds like an excellent one. What you mention about your anxiety seems completely reasonable to me. Have you thought about speaking to someone professional, perhaps reach out to Macmillan? Just reading on this forum that someone else is going through the same feelings and anxiety as me has helped. I was always worry that everyone else is coping better than me and that I'm just being a wuss!! But this forum has confirmed that all my worries are shared by others......and somehow I find that reassuring and even empowering.

Good luck with your return to work. Be kind to yourself and hope that you work through your anxieties and find yourself in a calmer, less anxious place emotionally soon. 

Hi thank you so much for your reply, I'm about to start counselling so I'm hoping it will help.

I went to a cancer centre the other dayand I stupidly burst into tears. I told the nurse a part of me feels I came out of hospital to fast but I also feel that I'd be better off not being here. 

She spoke to me about it all and told me my feelings are not stupid and that many feel like this

Thank you for sending me your kind message. 

I hope you are doing ok

We all have days were there are plenty of tears. Please do talk to anyone of us on here . We are here to support each other. Never think you are alone.  Say whatever you want.  Please good care of you and take it a day at a time. 

Thank you. It's mentally very hard

I'm due to return to work in around 3 weeks and I don't know how I feel about it at the minute, I had my left kidney removed 3 weeks ago so it's not been very long at all. I work as a HGV driver so it's not so much physical but it is very long hours, I was also told I couldn't drive for 6 weeks after surgery. I still have days when I'm an emotional wreck and they seem to come from nowhere, just hoping I'm slightly more stable by the time I start back. Hope you're doing better?

I had a period of using up to the prescribed maximums in morphine/oramorph. When I stopped even with titration I kept crying for no reason for ages.

Thanks I'm ok, how are you feeling now?

Hi - what about a phased return when you gradually build your days and hours up and generally try it and see how you get on? 

Hi

 Yeah that's what's been planned

I had my kidney removed 9 years ago now, it took 2.5 months before I could go back to work, I couldn't use the stairs at home for 3 weeks, at the time I felt shamed that I couldn't manage these things, I had to have my socks put on for me, as a 32 year old I was ashamed at the time. Looking back on it I was being far to hard on myself. This whole affair is very hard mentally. Have you accepted everything yet? It can take a little while to do that but you'll get there.