I've had these feelings for a while now - was advised to stop taking Tramadol as I kept having nightmares about killing someone. Every time I close my eyes I see that person. I'm seven weeks post op. Getting around is a bit easier, but still have scar tissue pain. I have a wonderful relationship with my partner, and he has literally done everything for me since my surgery. I absolutely love him to bits, he is my world, but just lately my moods are so terrible, and I feel we are going in different directions. I've said to him about contacting Macmillan for himself so he can offload his feelings and thoughts, but he says he's ok. I don't want him to bottle things up and explode one day. He does go for coffee with friends, and also attends AA meetings, so I do hope he talks about how he's feeling. I've said to others that I want things to go back to normal, whatever that is.
Hi Betsy,
I have read that at around this stage in the post-op journey (but perhaps also sooner, for some people) emotions can be affected...anxiety can rise...I can't remember the exact info I read so my reporting of what I read isn't as eloquent as it could be, but the gist seemed to be that what you are experiencing is normal, and likely to happen to a lot of people post-surgery. I haven't had it myself but I have seen that many others have.
The scar tissue pain: if your incisions are completely healed which I am sure they will be by now, start gently massaging them. Massage with your finger tips in circular movements. I actually found that this relieves the tenderness for the time I massage, which is a relief! I started doing this after my hysterectomy two years ago, which is how I found how much it helped me. You can do this literally for months and years, if you wish. It apparently breaks up the scar tissue as it forms - not in a damaging way, but in a way that means you don't get thick potentially painful adhesions. I think it's the first year or so that these adhesions can develop and if you start massaging gently at first, over the months you can massage slightly more firmly. It really did/does help me, and it won't harm you, likely quite the opposite. I have only just started massaging this time, as I am six weeks in this coming Tuesday but I had that allergic/bacterial rash throughout, and it has only these last few days stopped itching finally, after three goes at suitable creams from three different GP visits. I didn't dare massage whilst there was still even a slight bit of itching but the latest cream seems to have finally cleared it up, so I have been massaging now for a few days.
You can massage for a couple of minutes whenever you think of it...ie, several times a day. I have to remember to not massage when I'm out shopping as it could look a bit funny 
but I will sit in the garden for example and massage for a couple of minutes at a time. If it hurts more when you massage, stop the massage for now and try it again in a few days. You may find one or more of your incisions is ok to massage, or one or more feel too tender to massage, so go with how you feel.
I don't find anything that works for incision pain. I only took paracetamol but it didn't really make any difference so I take it very occasionally now if I feel a deeper twinge only. I take one turmeric and black pepper capsule once a day...I have done this for a long time for pain, to replace paracetamol...but please don't start this unless you have checked with your consultant, just in case it interacts with something else you are taking.
Not sure what Tramadol is? It sounds fairly strong if it's giving you nightmares.
From what I have read, it seems like all you are currently experiencing is pretty normal for this stage in your healing. You probably should advise your GP, however, as if you need Tramadol and this isn't agreeing with you, maybe he/she can suggest a similar alternative.
