Just had panic attack with mask fitting

Hi Macfarlane, thank you for your kind comments.  I want to thank everyone that helped me.  I have never had such a panic, I use a CPAP machine at night for my sleep apnea, and the nigh after the fitting I woke up from a nightmare to find myself destroying my cpap mask, by ripping it off my face.  The panic had gone so deep.  It was just so helpful with everyone's comments.  It is great to know you are not alone - and the fact others had the same problem enabled me to realise I was not being stupid, so it immediately took away the embarrassment bit of the problem, and I was left with the irrational panic around my claustrophobia.  I then took advice from others about re-focusing; taking music in (which helped a lot), although they have no music facilities in the fitting and initial scanning area (different physical location), so I used my phone; I also took Lorazepam; and I asked the team to cut eye holes, which helped enormously. All of these being ideas shared with me by the community - so again - thank you all.   Finally, there was one particular clip that pulled the mask really tight under my throat, and they were originally starting to clip from there, so I found I was 'off on one' before they got the whole mask clipped down even.  I asked them if they would clip in a different sequence leaving this throat clip to the end, and giving me a moment with everything else clipped, so I could get acclimatised, before they clipped the 'devil clip' into place.  This gave me time to get used to the pressure everywhere else before it hit my very sensitive throat - if you remember I have a super sensitive gag reflex - and this seemed to enable me to stay calm.  Once the mask was fitted, I was fine - I turned the music up loud, and away I went to a better place!  (Only temporarily though thank goodness! :))   Anyway, onwards - my next challenge is getting a PEG fitted ready for treatment to commence on the 9th May.  Andrew

Hi Clare, I wanted to reach out to you to thank you.  Your hypnosis ideas really enabled me to face up to this overwhelming, irrational fear.  The thing I was finding hard was that it was so irrational.  I am a very logical person, o irrational things are way outside my comfort zone.  The idea of doing the 'old Ben Franklin' pro's and con's list had never occurred to me, yet it fits perfectly with my very logical mind.  That was one of the key items that got me through, along with music, cutting out eye holes, and lorazepam as suggested by others in the community.  I would never have got through this ordeal by fire without everyone here giving me all these great ideas - and them my team implementing everything for me.  So again, many thanks - this is SO valuable.  Andrew

Hi Hazel, I wanted to thank you for all your support, and to say sorry for enjoying my reward curry last night when you can't - however I am not really sorry as you can enjoy the Spanish sun, when I can't!  So fair's fair.  However, you have given me a lot of support through this whole process, and I wanted to thank you for it.  I still, obviously, have the PEG to be fitted - oh - and 6 weeks of treatment to go... but at least there is a way for me to do this now.  So many thanks again to you for your part in getting me started.  Andrew

Hi Linda, many thanks for your help with my traumatic mask fitting.  I only got through with the help of this community, for which I thank you, and everyone.  Everyone has contributed something, that I have been able to collect together all the ideas and form them into my own coping mechanism - so that's one up for you!  Thank you, Andrew

Hi Mike, I wanted to thank you as well.  I have never realised the power of community until now - but without everyone who chipped in and gave me the benefit  if their own challenges and ideas, I would not have been able to face this.  I went to the scan still on the edge - but as I got into it, I implemented one by one each of the ideas people had given me, which I had turned into my 'battle plan', and gradually got into a better place as I 'switched on' each idea one by one.  It was just amazing how well it worked - and with the wonderful support of the team, who facilitated my somewhat strange approach to getting the mask on, and getting to the scan - it went really well.  I was in the mask for ages as well, as the cutting of the eye holes meant that all their registration marks went awry and they had to completely sticker up the mask all over again!  So, many thanks again for helping create this successful outcome for me.  Andrew

Hi Jo, thanks to you as well for your help.  The eye holes were one of the items in my 'battle plan' that got me through.  it just hearing the experiences of so many people was what really did it for me  - knowing that it is not 'just me' is a major starting point for overcoming panic.   So, again, many thanks for taking the time to engage and being one of the team that enable me to conquer my very real and overwhelming fears.  Andrew

Hi Andrew.  You’re welcome. No sun biking in 30 km winds weathers been very mixed. But glad you enjoyed curry. We’re  all here for next stages. 
Hazel 

Thanks Nicky, have you finished your treatment  now? I had no problem with the mask in any way until I was sick in the waiting room. Then I went in feeling very worried with the ‘what if I’m sick?’ fear and nearly couldn’t do it. I must have told myself that I felt well about 100 times! I imagined myself out in the country breathing in fresh air and it helped but I was glad to get out of there that day! X

Hi Clare 

I finished my initial treatments and radiotherapy around 13 years ago. I do relate and empathise  with so many of the anxieties and things people go through  posted here, having been through so much too. 

Radiotherapy I found myself worrying about as I am claustrophobic, so I was always going to be anxious about the procedure. I got through it and once I knew what to expect I was okay but relieved when it was finished. I also was sick on arrival a few times before radiotherapy, and yes this made me more anxious that this would happen during radiotherapy, but it never did. I just told the radiotherapy team because they always checked how you were on the day. They were really understanding and said we will keep a close eye on you and let us know if you anticipate you are going to be sick. It helps us so much when we are treated by so much compassion. Well done for getting through your fear of being sick  that day and talking your way through this. 

 I could see that I was probably going to have medical procedures like MRIs for the foreseeable. I knew I had to manage my claustrophobia and have a plan to see me through. I am not very good at imagining say for example - I am on some lovely beach  to take my mind from the situation, my brain does not work this way. So I am glad that I found my own way of closing my eyes, gentle breathing in and out and disengaging from my surroundings with a calm noise background  working for me. 

It is so  good when we find a way through to help overcome or alleviate our fears the best we can to make things more doable for us. It just gives us more confidence to cope with things when we are going through so much. 

Take care 

Nicky

Hi Linda, I felt relief reading about your experience with the mask. I had 20 sessions of radiotherapy and each time I always had difficulty with not being able to breathe. They did cut holes for eyes for me. The worse time was when it took 9 attempts to put it on. I thought it was just me being difficult, so glad to read others had issues too.