42 year old son in law diagnosed with Oesophageal cancer and multiple mets

Elsie, never and I mean NEVER apologise for letting rip on this wonderful forum. Every single one of us in this support group will be empathising with you and your family. My advice? Rant away, day or night, or both! There's always someone on here who will be there for you.

Much Love to you and yours 

Anthony x

Hi 

what a dreadful situation for you all,:cancer has no boundaries does it ! but please know that as Anthony says there are always people here with their own stories to tell who will support you also there is a macmillan help line I haven’t used it myself but might be good for you and your daughter to talk to them ! 
Sending my love and never feel bad about offloading on here 

Tricia 

elsie 66 you are in the right place and as our lovely bob says this is the place to say what you want, when you want, and question/ask anything, its a unique family we have all joined not voluntary, but what a family to be in.  no rules or hand book for dealing with this cancer so and so, but the help, support and advice from people already starting/further along/completing this journey is all there for you to use.

love jules

Hello Elsie, I'm sorry to read about your struggle and this awful experience for you all. Your son-in-law must tell the MDT if the pain relief is inadequate. My husband was 'told off' by his for waiting until his appointment to tell them how much pain he was in. His was in his mouth but there are others on here who have had pain in their back. I think it was because the tumour in the oesophagus was pressing on the spine. I hope he gets some respite soon.

Sending love,

Lorraine

Hi Elsie66 

So sorry to hear your son in law is going through this .It must be very stressful and upsetting for all the family .

We were told by a cancer specialist that radiotherapy can help alleviate bone pain …I’m assuming he is still at home ? If so I would suggest contacting his specialist nurse , Community nurses , Macmillan nurse ( if he has one ) and everyone who is involved in your son in laws medical care to emphasise the pain he is experiencing and ask about Hospice care ( either at home or in an hospice ) where his pain could be managed more efficiently. We did this for my Dad earlier this year .He had multiple cancers including rib cage and we managed to keep him pain free and comfortable.

Sincerely  hope your son in law receives the help he needs asap 

Best wishes J 

So sorry to read this, so distressing for you all. Please, please reach out the pain / care team over and over again if you have to, to get them to address his pain. How awful for him and for you all. I hope someone somewhere can help. I’m so very sorry sending love and strength to you all 

claire xx

We're all here to listen and offer advice don't ever feel alone. 

Sorry you find yourselves in this awful situation stay strong and use us all to off load to.

Love and best wishes 

Vonn xx

Hi Elsie. So sorry to read about the pain your son in law is going through and the stress on yourself  his family. Most of the major hospitals have pain management teams. I am not sure how they liaise with out patients but  I suggest you get in touch with his nurse specialist and see if anything more can be done. I have not experienced anything like your son is going through but when I was in pain I phoned the help line and was admitted to the acute oncology ward at our hospital immediately and they sorted me out. I do hope he can get some relief soon.

Hi Elsie66,

Can relate so well to what you are going through

My husband has stage 4 oesophagal cancer with bone metastases in rib, spine & pelvis. Has had chemo, radiotherapy, & now more chemo with immunotherapy. He was diagnosed in April 2024 & it just keeps spreading.

 Watching him struggle with the pain is the worst thing ever & breaks my heart. He spends most of the time lying on the bed as it's the only place he feels vaguely comfortable. He can barely walk & shuffles around with a walking frame. 

Sometimes it's just too much to bear - his life so reduced & his strength & spirit destroyed.

Am trying to stay strong for him but it's so tough.

Sending hugs

MOLLYTK 

Hello Molly,

I'm very sorry to read about your husband's suffering. It sounds awful for you both. I hope the treatment eventually gives him some respite from the pain.

You don't have to be strong all the time. 

Love and hugs,

Lorraine x