Dads diagnosis

Hi there,

Really really sorry to hear about your Dad.  I know it feels like an age before you get the pet scan results and the waiting is awful, but take some comfort in the fact that he's not in any pain.  Until you have the scan results a care regime can't be put together, I know it's hard not to assume the worst but once you know there may be some chemo which can reduce the sizeof the tumor so he is able to swallow, plus he may be able to have a stent put in - again you need to wait until you have all the results and can discuss with an oncologist but don't lose hope.

It must be so hard on you feeling alone in all this - I'm not sure if you've tried calling macmillan?  Some very lovely people there who can offer help and support.

My husband was diagnosed stage 4 so I understand what a tough time you must be having. Feel free to private message me if it helps, sending you hugs

xxx

 I had my PET scan results within hours. Your father obviously has a worse tumour than myself. I do no 4 chemo next week but have never had a big problem eating etc.  Hope all turns out ok ish !!!!

Thank you so much for your kind words. I was so wary posting on here but you forget how many people are going through this. Dad did get a stent fitted but it went wrong so they tried again and said the mass was too big to get passe past unfortunately. I have a great family backup on my mums side including my mum who vists my dad regular as they are still on good terms considering they havent been together since i was 4. still doesn't stop the feeling that its me alone though. I think i can deal with the terminal illness but its so much harder knowing he can't even have a swig of water without throwing up hours after. we have our MDT meeting tuesday hopefully with full results so we can deal with it. Weirdly enough i know its bad and getting worse each day looking at him but he's hasn't a clue what's really going on which makes it harder. Sorry for the droaning message bad enough your going through it yourself its just nice to vent. Please keep in touch and thank you again for your kind words. Good luck with your husbands journey lots of love to you both. Xxxx

Wish you lots of luck with the results after the MDT meeting.  Knowing exactly where you stand will make it easier to make a plan and deal with it - my advice to you would be to take it one step at a time, all the tests and discussions mixed with the emotions can make it quite overwhelming.  

I know it must be horrible to see him not be able to have a drink, but try and stay positive - I wish for better times ahead for your Dad.  Good to hear you have good family backup, but do try and take care of yourself too, easy to say I know.. 

And honestly no apologies needed - it's ok to get upset and vent, this is a very difficult time but there's a very supportive community on here who understand.  Sending you lots of love, feel free to message anytime xxx 

Hi Megan,

My mum was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer last month. Stage 4- most heartbreaking diagnosis. It was a torturous wait for results. It took 6 weeks from admittance to hospital due to severe malnourishment to getting diagnosis. Like your Dad she couldn't even keep water down. She was discharged from hospital after 2 weeks with no diagnosis and an NG tube in. She had a stent fitted 2 weeks later. She can keep down small amounts of diet and fluid. She needs to drink warm water when eating anything to help her food stay down. We're currently awaiting her to start chemo.

She doesn't want to know too much information. She knows it palliative but doesn't want to know 'how long' or how big the tumour is as she feels that information may have a negative effect on her mentally. She is trying her hardest to stay as positive as possible (as am I). I feel very alone too. I have brothers but they have families and live in Ireland.

Really hope the results from your Dads examinations are as positive as possible.

Feel free to message me. Its such a scary time right now.

x