On 14th November I found my 62 year old father on the floor having suffered what we now have come to believe was a TI (Stroke). For weeks previously he had been suffering with headaches. Something that has never truly affected him before. We both spoke of the possibility of going to the Hospital to see if there was anything sinister. However, we never got there before he collapsed in his room.
That very same night, we found out that he was diagnosed with a brain tumour. Glioblastoma. My heart sank. A few days later we also came to find out that not only had he got the tumour on his brain but a shadow on his kidney. What we cannot bring our heads around and neither can the doctors is that it’s not a continuation or a spread. It is it’s own singular growth.
I guess at the moment I am very much on edge. I’m 26 and I am my dad’s carer. I have been for years. I have so many questions not only for his health but my own since my own isn’t great.
If any carers that are in the same situation as myself see this, any advice would be very much appreciated. More so toward if I will be able to be around him when he does undergo chemo if my own immune system is so shot.
Hi Caringbrunette
a warm welcome to the online community. So sorry to hear about all that's been going on with your dad. Life's cruel.
My own experience lies in supporting my late husband through his GBM journey and throughout his journey there were no secondary tumours identified.
Drawing from experience with my own health from a few years ago. An MRI for a lump in my stomach picked up a kidney tumour (benign thankfully) and the consultant explained to me at the time that modern imaging is picking up tumours etc that may have been there for years undiscovered. Perhaps the shadow on your dad's kidney has been there for a long time and its just coincidence that imaging is detecting it now.?
Trust that your dad's medical team will investigate thoroughly as they see fit.
With regards to whether you can be around your dad while he undergoes chemo that's a question for his medical team and your own doctor. I would hope that the answer would be yes and perhaps it might be an idea to restrict who you come into contact with in case any well meaning friends/family accidentally pass something on. Again I'm not a medical expert but throughout G's treatment we applied common sense eg if someone was under the weather, we kept him away from them until they had shaken off whatever lurgy it was that they had had. He was at his most vulnerable during lockdown in late 2020 so in actual fact day to day living restrictions made it easier. Who would ever have thought we'd have been saying there was a positive to Covid lockdown?
This is a safe and supportive space so please reach out here anytime. There's always someone around here to listen who gets it, someone to hold your hand and to offer that virtual hug when its needed. You're not alone. We've got you.
There's also some great general carer advice on the main website. here's the link Supporting someone with cancer | Macmillan Cancer Support
It’s always good to talk so please remember that you can also call the Macmillan Support Services on 0808 808 00 00 - most services are open 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week Clicking here to see what is available. This service provides lots of cancer information, emotional support, benefit and financial guidance or just a listening ear.
for now though I'm sending you a huge virtual hug and lots of positive energy. Stay strong.
love n hugs
Wee Me xx
Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
I hope you get some answers and a plan for the way forward from your appointment. One wee suggestion - write down all your questions, fears/concerns and take those notes to the appointment. They'll help keep you on track and make sure you don't forget to ask something that's important to you. It's all too easy to become overwhelmed in these early appointments and be railroaded into what the Dr wants rather than what's best for you both.
I'll be thinking positive thoughts for you. Stay strong.
love n hugs
Wee Me xx
Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
