New to this…!

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I’m new to the community.

I didn’t know if I wanted to join or not, I still don’t really!

I was diagnosed back in June with breast cancer a big shock to say the least. it was going to be a lumpectomy but has ended up being a mastectomy. I had this 6 weeks ago and now wait to see the oncologist in the middle of November to discuss the next step…. chemo.

i am struggling with all of the waiting. I’m not sure how to feel or what to think. I’m trying to be positive and keep up beat as everyone tells you that’s what you need to do, I am trying….

well that’s me for now. 

  • Hi HopeH

    Welcome to the forum and I am sorry top hear that you were diagnosed with breast cancer and needed a mastectomy.  The waiting for results is hard but once you know them things should start to feel better hopefully.  There is no right or wrong way to feel about a cancer diagnosis and it's ok not to feel positive about it.

    Wishing you the best of luck with your results.

    Best wishes

    Daisy53

    Community Champion Badge

  • Hi HopeH 

    I'd echo what Daisy53 said: there is no right or wrong way to feel about cancer and it's okay not to feel positive about it. 

    Do you have a Maggie's Centre near you ? I found them very helpful, in so many ways - endless cups of tea, free biscuits, friendly faces and shoulders to cry on. One of the counsellors there told me the words "Be Positive" were banned ! 

    There's an article somewhere on this site called "Toxic Positivity." I'll see if I can find a link to it. 

    I also found Macmillan nurses very helpful. I rang them using the number on this site. 

    Please be gentle with yourself. 

  • Hi HopeH

    As others have said, there is no right or wrong way to feel and being told to “be positive” is unhelpful. I wasn’t positive between diagnosis and surgery with all the waiting and more waiting... I was shocked, in denial, then scared and anxious, tired and hungry, and when surgery was cancelled twice was frustrated and at times outright furious. I certainly wasn’t positive! But, these feelings did pass, for me this was when I finally had the surgery, for others this may be at a different stage in their journey. 

    The most helpful thing I found was a journal. A simple notebook where I dumped all those feelings on a page. I did this every morning, even if I was feeling okay. It was almost like giving myself a dedicated time to think and feel about my cancer and then the book was closed for the rest of the day. Didn’t always work, and thoughts and worry did of course creep in at other times, but it helped. 

    Keep talking here, there are people to support you, however you are feeling. x

  • Hi HopeH, I've just added my first blog today....  I was diagnosed this afternoon and still waiting for the HER2 result which determines my treatment plan (hopefully this should be within a week).  The waiting is the worst :(

  • Hi Eebee 

    that’s a good idea about the note book…. kind of like get it out, good or bad and then close it for the day and get on. I think I’ll give it a go :-) 

  • Hi jobat 

    Yes!

    I hope you find out your treatment plan soon. I think having a plan helps you feel slightly more in control of some thing that is out of our control, so kind of helps a bit.

    time can go so fast, but also so slow.

    sending a hug 

    • Hi Bear and Tilly

    Thanks for the reply.

    yes if you can find the link that could be good please.

    i don’t know of a Maggies centre nr me.

    what sort of things can you call the nurses about?

    Thank you and I will try to be gentle with me…. :-) 

  • Thanks so much!  X

  • Hi I was diagnosed with breast cancer in July and I'm taking day by day thinking about future is sometimes too much my most worries are it coming back and not being able to have children I'm 27 and I'm scared not being able have kids with taking hormone therapy have any you had children whilst taking or anything related to that 

  • I was diagnosed the same week that Covid was announced, so double whammy.  It took from February until June until there was an uncontaminated hospital that could operate, so I was put on a prescription of Letrazole to keep things from spreading in the mean time. As a precaution my lymph gland was removed and it was found that the cancer had got there, but the drug had completely killed off the tumours there.  After the operations (2.. the second to increase the boundary ) I went onto the chemo. Unfortunately the pic line for administering the chemo caused a blood clot in my lung, so chemo was stopped and daily self administered blood thinning injections then Apixoban tablets afterwards.  The blood thinning caused a bleed, so into hospital for transfusions. Whilst in hospital I caught Covid, the whole ward got it.  I then went on to the radiotherapy for fifteen daily bouts.  BUT now it's all in the past .  I just want to add that despite all these disasters I never once felt threatened, I did think positive,  and I shrug off those lovely comments from friends who said how brave I was, because I never thought anything was amiss!  Just think of all the research done to help us, and is DOES work. I know I was lucky, but DO think positive. IT WORKS!