Anxiety

I am about 2 weeks behind you with this treatment. I too am terrified. My doctor has doubled my dose of citalapram, and said that he will double the dose in a couple of weeks time. He also gave me some diazapram to use when needed. I know that this chemical method may not suit everyone but I am willing to try nearly anything to stop the constant anxiety. I have also booked in for some hypnotherapy in June which people tell me will help.

I have also been matched with a woman who has had similar experience of breast cancer through a charity who I will talk with.

all little steps hopefully will help with the big picture.

my oncologist has been trying to contact me but my phone has been playing up so I will need to contact them after the bank holiday.

but even doing that takes courage as I am pretending that this is all a bad dream and I will wake up soon.

good luck tomorrow 

let us know how you go on

Hi thanks for the reply...I think once it starts my anxiety will ease up a bit, it's the unknown,the fear of what side effects I could have, hoping my blood levels are good each time so as not to delay treatment. Plus I don't drive and the hospital is a long way, I've asked for patient transport I'm worrying about that too, will they pick me up on time etc etc all running through my poor overcrowded head! I know what you mean about the bad dream! Thankyou I will do xxx

Hi Musicmumma, I didn’t have a picc line, I had an arm port instead which went under the skin meaning I could shower and swim once healed. A picc line needs to be covered every showertime and one can go swimming. It also needs to be flushed each week where as a port is every 12 weeks. Perhaps your hospital can do both and discuss both options with you to see what would work well for your situation. The nurses that insert these are great and will talk you through everything. It doesn’t hurt as they will numb the area well. Both of course are brilliant as they can take bloods and do chemo through them and it saves your veins from the chemo drugs and also having to find a vein each time for bloods and chemo.

I was nervous just before hand but with the nurses explaining everything as they went along and in advance it was very reassuring.

Wishing you all the best.

Hugs from cuffcake x x x x x

Hi Cuffcake...Thankyou for your reply.  I have already asked if they will give me a showerproof cover for it and the nurse said yes, otherwise I would have to buy one. I think that's why they are inserting the picc line so that its easier than, like you said finding a vein each time. The arm port sounds good I will enquire about it. Thankyou again, I just want to get it over with life is on hold this year  but fingers xd it will be better next year

 Musicmumma You can get waterproof covers  on prescription. Make sure you have applied for exemption certificate via NHS so you don't have to pay. 

Sorry didn’t mean to report. Not sure how that happened

Hi musicmumma

I agree with cuffcake20000. Always nervous before going for chemo but the nurses are amazing. Suffer with anxiety and depression here. The only side effect I hated was how it boggled my mind. I was put on extra antidepressants so don't worry about asking for more help. Ask your doctor about propranolol. This helps with anx and dep. I started off on 10mgs 3x a day then put up to 40mgs 3x a day. Was just weaning off most tablets but I find myself facing it again. This time I'm having it weekly as research shows it lessens the side effects. I should be starting mine beginning of July but I'll follow you all if that's okay. Good luck on your journey and try not to worry too much but here if you need any support love Helen xx

Hi Helen, thankyou for your reply. This is all new to me so it's the fear of the unknown I think. I'm just waiting to get my picc line fitted and start EC every 2 weeks from tomorrow x4..then pax once a week for 12 weeks. Had mastectomy in March..still numb and getting stabbing pains, but dealing with it ok.Bloody Cancer, you really don't know when it will choose you. Thanks again..Good luck to you too..much live Jan x