1st chemo

Hello I’m new to this group, so hello to all. I’m Karen and I’m 53. Just gonna tell u my story. I felt a lump in my breast end of June but wasn’t too sure if it was. I went on holiday a day later for a week. When I got back it was still there. I attended my mammogram on 1st August then also had a ultrasound the same day. Radiologist then took a biopsy of my tumour and lymph node and put in metal clips. 2 weeks layers 12th August I got my results it was cancer and it doesn’t appear to have gone to lymph nodes. 
I still don’t know the name of my tumour but I do know it’s not the common one. I am ER negative, PR 5/8 pos and HER-2 negative. Grade 3 and stage 1/2. I had my very 1st chemo on 1st September and also my picc line put in. I have to tell you all I was dreading the PICC line and omg it was absolutely fine so please don’t be worried about that and it saves having needles every week. I first chemo was absolutely fine too and I still feel ok now. I’m having chemo called Paclitaxel weekly for 12 weeks then EC every 2 weeks 4 doses then surgery then radiotherapy   

You may think I appear to to be very calm writing this and yes I have calmed down a lot. When I got my results and got home I sobbed, lost control a bit didn’t eat didn’t sleep was on the macmillan 24 hr line constantly. I was convinced this was the end of me, made a MASSIVE HUGH mistake and looked on the internet which sent me thinking there was nothing down for me.

After speaking to my oncologist I feel so positive now and haven’t looked on internet. 
obviously I’m still scared and now I’m just waiting to feel ill from chemo which by the may not happen. I will defo lose my hair but in the great scheme of things this is last on my list. 
The best advice I can give is listen to your Oncologist as they have the knowledge about the cancer and will tell you everything you need to know eg if it’s early stages etc  

God bless you all xxxxxx