Emotional wreck

Hi there, you've been through a lot so please don't be too hard on yourself. It's very normal to feel emotional at times, both cancer and surgery are pretty major things and you and your body are coping with this and it takes time to heal, both physically and mentally.

Macmillan have a great helpline, and an online chat, and are there to help when we're feeling down or have questions so don't hesitate to use it. And this forum is great, with lots of people who know exactly how your feel.

Whilst it doesn’t feel like it now, I am sure it won't be long until you are physically a bit more able and in the meantime I am sure your kids are happy to help and support. My daughter, she's 23, was glad to feel useful when I was ill.

• I hope you can get comfortable and get some rest tonight x

You’ve been through so much and the fact you're still worried about your kids shows what a great parent you are, they want to be there for you as much as you are for them. It’s very early days and add a virus on top of that, no wonder you feel low. Be gentle with yourself, post surgery is awful snd you’ve the emotional side of what you’ve gone through to process. Hope you feel better tomorrow after a good sleep xx

Hi Irishgirl16

Thank you so much for your reply, maybe I am expecting to much from myself, probably I didn't really know what to expect, I was so anxious about the surgery I was just concentrating on getting that over 

I just feel so alone at the moment, i suppose I feel like I need to talk to people who understand x

Thank you Anna12345 

I think it's only now that it's really sunk in if that makes sense,

Your probably right and they have been great but I feel a burden to my kids not being able to do things, I'm so used to being the one who gets things done x

Yup that’s me too, I’m the busy one, the organiser, just can’t do it atm! I’m exhausted all the time. I have a 12 year old who’s awesome and I feel guilty all the time that our life has become so small of late between cancer and Covid. I don’t think you do start processing it until your finished treatment or on the home run, it’s all you can do to keep up with the pace of what’s happening until then. We’re always so bloody hard on ourselves, if we were advising a friend we’d be far kinder!! Rest for now, all that stuff will be waiting for you when you’re up to it xx

Thank you, your right I would be saying the same as you if it was a friend so maybe I need to be kinder to myself...and more patient lol, 

I've still got radiotherapy to get through, hoping for a couple of better weeks before that starts

thank you for taking the time to reply to me xxx 

As others have said, don't be hard on yourself and it is normal to feel this way. I wrote my first post on here about 8 or 9 months after chemo and surgery as I felt so low and lacklustre. It takes a long time for it all to sink in. On top of that, you are in the very early days of recovery for your surgery. My breast can still be a bit sore at times now, 11 months post-surgery. It took me months to get full mobility of my arm, so keep doing those exercises.

You have been through so much, allow yourself the need to grieve for the old you and for everything that you have just gone through.

Your kids sound like they are giving you some amazing support! But there is nothing wrong with feeling low, it is part of the process.

Hope today is a better day for you, take care x

Hi  how are you doing today?