a date that I was focusing on came and went without celebration 
it's been five years since diagnosis and my NHS loyalty card has now expired
a milestone I was supposed to celebrate with my friend Kacang but the lockdown has prevented any kind of travel
Part of me is a bit blazé about covid-19, I've had pneumonia a couple of times and got over it.
What we mustn't let happen is people to be reluctant to see their GP for screening over any concerns, early detection is VITAL. We need to normalise being breast aware to the same level as your beauty routines, manicure, pedicure, breast exam, get my roots done, breast exam. Moles too, I have an app that prompts me to look at a couple of slightly iffy moles. It's your body, it's your life.
Trust your instincts, I was told I was fine for more than three years, nothing to worry about, it's just your age and hormones. I'd not be here now if I hadn't had the option to pay for a private screening, firstly to establish I did have breast cancer but secondly I had to use the private MRI report to prove the surgeon had missed a whole tumour by neatly cutting around it.
What have I learned over the last five years ?
seize the moment, every day is valuable, don't wallow in self pity, don't hold on to anger, let it go (easier said than done)
move on, put it behind you but don't become complacent
I used this site to work through a lot of issues and I'm glad it's here, I found it therapeutic to try and help others going through the same emotions I had been. Confusion, anger, disbelief, blaming, bargaining, more anger, sadness, denial. Hauling the newbies into the lifeboats.
and 98% of people were so grateful and it felt good to be able to help with just a few words, sometimes more of an essay to be fair but talking helps and yes, I know it's a cliché but time really does help. Did you all see what happened with Italy giving us advice and then us giving the Americans advice over coronaviruses and the lockdown situations, some of my American friends were in free fall panic, now they've moved into a more practical phase.
2020 was going to be great, it's not turning out how it was supposed to but I'm feeling confident it will improve, it doesn't feel like it can get much worse
I'm still here, if anyone wants to ask anything use the @ Carolyn28
cheers everyone
Carolyn
xx
Hiya Carolyn28
Where did that 5 years go 
I have visions of you and Lynn facetiming a Haka 
Hugs, G n' J
Carolyn28 it must be time for some.....
I for one am very glad you are still around and doing well. Even during these shitty times That’s definitely worth celebrating! Thank you for all your support and advice over the years, oh and of course the Panda’s! Stay vigilant my friend, look after yourself! Sal xxx
Well done Carolyn28
and thanks for your help when I needed it xxx
