Our very good friend has just been diagnosed with this, had a lot of it removed and about to start his six weeks of treatment. - we want to be supportive but not in his face all the time as he is quite a private person and he doesn’t show his emotions so we are looking for information on how others have dealt with this and hopefully we can pick out what we think may work for us.
Hi
Welcome to the online community. Sorry to hear about your friend's diagnosis but I am so touched by your consideration for their feelings.
My husband was diagnosed with a grade4 GBM in early Sept 2020 so I can empathise entirely with the situation. He too doesn't show is emotions. In fact, I've always described him as a bit of a chameleon - he tries to blend in with whatever friend group he is with.
I think the key thing here is to be "normal" around your friend. They are going through their own roller coaster journey so be led by what they want to do and feel up to doing. Keep in touch but stay in touch. Something that really angers me is the number of "friends" who have disappeared after the first few weeks. Consistency is key in my experience. My husband's core group of friends have been great- they tag team - eg one sees him one week, one sees him the next etc. In the early days it was more frequent but they have lives and families too. Be mindful of your friend's limitations. In my husband's case, his tumour has left him barely able to read and with sight issues so sending What's App messages isn't too successful but a quick phone call is.
Having things to look forward to seems to help my husband too eg boys weekend away or trip to watch rugby or even going for a pint. It doesn't need to be something big.
As I said be led by them- if they want to talk, they'll talk. If they don't then that's equally fine. You'll know yourselves by how they're being. Remember they are still the same person inside and deep down they're probably quite scared right now.
There is also a (+) Family and friends forum - Macmillan Online Community on here that you might find some other kindred spirits in. There's also the (+) Glioblastoma multiforme brain tumour - Macmillan Online Community. I've found both to be a great source of support over the past year or so
Macmillan Support Services also offer lots of information, support, financial guidance or just someone to listen. It’s free to call 0808 808 0000. Most services are available 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week. Have a look by Clicking here to see what is available. We also have our Ask an Expert section of you have a more medical/technical , but do allow two to three working days for replies from our expert team.
I hope this has helped. I get that it's a scary time for you too. Stay strong.
love n hugs
Wee Me xx
Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
