My Dad 66yr old with bowel cancer stage 4 with liver mets

Great to hear from you Court.  And pleased to hear that your Mum is doing OK, hopefully sorting out her new symptoms and keeping on top of them.  Patrick, lets hope you can get some meds to sort out promblems also... my Dad reckons he jingles when he walks with all the pills inside him!!  In regards to your veins, have they tried a PICC line?  Dad has one in his arm, that goes runs a small pipe to some vein near his heart.  It is a little bit of care, but very do able and Dad has had no problems with it - just means no vein searching when he goes for treatment.  Also they can do a central line that is in your chest, less care than the PICC - but here at least, they have a waiting list for these.  You may have already tried it, or dennied it for what ever reason, or I may be stating the obvious - just thought might be worth a mention anyway.  TAKE CARE ALL!!  - JULES              

Jules,

I am very reluctant to have either a PICC, central or Hickman line because of the risk of infection. The statistics suggest it is quite common as a problem and even the chemo nursesd admitted it can be a problem. However I may have to have one if my veins collapse further. Needs must when the devil drives...

Patrick

Hi everyone Gregory is just having 1st second line chemo. He decided to reduce his fentanyl patch and it has not been good idea. The pain came back so he put it back. He also started having swollen feet which I am worried about.  It is good to hear some good news in this forum and I wish all of you to continue them.                               Patrick - Gregory has hickman line and he had problems with veins too. I wish you strength and good further results. I hope that all of you will have great Christmas.          Magda

Hi everyone,

I've been away for a while and unable to keep up so I hope you are all ok.  I just want to wish you all the best Christmas possible.  Take care.

All my love

Ann xx

Hi All,

Just  want to thank you all for sharing our journey over the last year. Lets hope good news flows in 2011! We have managed a fab christmas and more food planned for tomorrow!

Melissa  I also want to pay tribute to you for your selfless giving on this page. You always offered words of kindness to all. I truely hope that you are being surrounded by love and I am very sorry for your loss.

Thinking of you all as a new year approaches

Love Court

Hi all - Yes Court you are so right, it is so touching and also helps so much from all the people who have added to this site.  Some good news, and the bad, and also just support and the knowledge that I feel we all have with going through this together!  Yes and I too wish loads of positive energy for all out there for 2011.

We had a wonderful Christmas and Dad has been feeling really good, though we could see still losing weight.  This is why this news came like a bolt out of the blue and knocked us for a six.  So for us thing are not good.  Dad went for his routine appt with his Onc last Thursday 29th (which we actually thought was a waste of time and a pain of a time in amongst Chrissy and all), Mum and Dad went by themselves as me the kids and my husband were away spending time with his family, only to get a call from Mum to say that the news was not good.  I was like what?!  None of us expected that news at this stage with Dad, with what we thought being good and only in the last month getting a scan that said that the tumors had shrunk by about a third.  They did mention a small new tumor in the liver, but all in all we were on top.   Well the Onc examined Dad, and felt more lumps in his tummy, and has lost around 10 kilo quickly.  He said this all is a bad sign that this new tumor is agressive and taking over the liver, he said no more chemo and explained that things will go down very quickly and what to expect.  No scan either, he said no point. I can't stop crying, and I just feel so shocked.  If I had known there was going to be any news like that I would ahve been there.  Poor Mum is beside herself not knowing how she is going to cope without her best friend who she does everthing with.  I'm so scared, I don't want to see Dad go through this.  I haven't seen Dad yet (Of course have talked to him) but will this weekend, and we intend (everything going well) to take our kids up to his favourite fishing place in the world and have some good times.  I'm just so scared to see him, as I've tried to be so strong all the way through this ordeal and now feel out of huff, and know that just isn't going to happen, that I will break down.  We haven't said much to our kids yet as we have been on holiday.  We just said that I'm upset as Poppy's chemo isn't working anymore.  We will fill them in a bit more in the next couple of days, which i'm also dreading.  Oh I wish I wasn't the bearer of bad news, as I always found that hard reading things like this on other sites.  So those of you who have things going well, please don't be too deterred by all this, as everyone is so very different out there.   Wishing you all a Happy New Year and wishing you love and support  XOX                

Dearest Jules.  I am so sorry to read your thread and the news that you received.  It is such sad news and especially when you thought everything was looking well for a little time.  When they say there is no more treatment I think it must be like having the stuffing knocked out of you.  While there is treatment you like to think there is hope.

I am not going to say you will be strong again when you see your dad because I don't think you know how you will react until the moment arrives.  I am sure with the kids there you will surprise yourself.  I like the idea of going to the favourite fishing place. I hope he is up to it.  Hopefully as he was well at christmas he will continue like that for sometime.

Unfortunately Alex seems to be unwell alot of the time especially with stomach problems.  Hopefully we will get some answers as he has a scan this coming Wednesday and we will get the results the following week.  I am not sure if it is the scan looming or him just feeling not well but he is so short tempered with the boys that I feel as though I am a continual referee in the house.  2 14 year olds who bicker with each other is bad enough but when Alex joins in I sometimes feel like walking the dog and not coming back!!!!!

We did have a great Christmas and New Year although Alex was very emotional about New Year unlike last year.  I think that is because the oncologist said at diagnosis that he had on average 2 years and that is up in May.  I know these are numbers just worked out as an average and he could have another 2 years but it does play on the mind.

I hope everyone else is ok, I know alot of us have scans and results coming through in the next few weeks so hopefully good news will be posted.  

Keep smiling

Jacqui

Hi all

I am sorry to hear bad news from some of you. Unfortunately I do not have good news too. Gregory has started having difficulties to move, walk, sit etc. The pain and vomiting are under control but he is having diarrhea. He has second cycle of chemo scheduled on Wednesday but doctors think that he may not be able to get more chemo. He insists that he wants it. Also we were told that without chemo he has left couple weeks to live not months. There is also very little chance that the chemo will help and also it may even shorten his life. So nothing more to add...

I wish all of you the best in New Year...

Magda

Hi, Well tonight I have cried for you all. It seems the only fitting reply. The pain is deep and protracted on this journey. Jules I  was so sad when I read of your pain in seeing your dad. You are the most wonderful daughter because he is clearly a good dad. Hope that deep love carries you both. .Always here for you.

Magda, I am so sorry Gregory is having such a difficult time. Mum is having chemo on wednesday so I will be thinking of Gregory and hope he gets his wishes. I am also glad he has you in his life to comfort him. I hope there is someone there to help you too.

Jash, I was wondering if your husband 's pain gets worse at certain times. My mum has experinced pain during her off week. This time was ok . Then off course the mind games start.

To be honest I realised early on that some people  were never going to understand the hurt we go through and I as a rule dont burden them. Thats why its so important that we can all come here and take off the masks.

Love to you all

Court

Jules & Magda I was so sorry to hear your news - it seems such a cruel way to start a new year.

Jules I hope you can arrange the things as you'd hope so you can store away some good memories for the hardtimes ahead

Magda I know you're a long way from home so I hope you have someone close by that you can turn to.

I know you will both find the strength you need but please remember there are many  shoulders on this site more than willing to help

my thoughts are with you Kate